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Comcasm
An intense, lengthy period of incompetence. Stemming from Comcast Cable Corp.'s awesome ability to blow balls and have 15-20% downtime. Comcast offers a shitty service that works at it's advertised speed around 30-40% of the time, despite their recent price increases. Fuck Comcast.
Comcasm by comcastblows December 25, 2008
Related Words
Comcasm • Comcast • comcastic • comcasting • Comcasted • comcastrophe • comcastration • Comcascism • Comcassed • Comcast and chill
Comcast Gambit
The untimely and prolonged malfunction of an internet connection resulting in great inconvenience, such as the forfeiture of an online chess match/tournament. Dubbed by the chess master and Youtube personality Jerry (ChessNetwork).
This phrase is a merging of two terms: the terrible internet provider (Comcast) with the chess term (gambit), a tactical and deliberate sacrifice of a chess piece. However, the Comcast Gambit is unique from all others in that it fails to be either voluntary or tactical.
This phrase is a merging of two terms: the terrible internet provider (Comcast) with the chess term (gambit), a tactical and deliberate sacrifice of a chess piece. However, the Comcast Gambit is unique from all others in that it fails to be either voluntary or tactical.
1. Marcellus, with the black pieces, found himself in a superior position with a time advantage in a blitz chess match. To his opponent's relief, the Comcast Gambit was then played, resulting in an immediate win for white.
2. After completing his essay final by 11:55 pm, Leland proceeded to submit it online before the 11:59 pm deadline. However, his shoddy internet service was down -- a textbook Comcast Gambit.
2. After completing his essay final by 11:55 pm, Leland proceeded to submit it online before the 11:59 pm deadline. However, his shoddy internet service was down -- a textbook Comcast Gambit.
Comcast Gambit by Sinchronize January 2, 2013
Comcast
It began with the creation of the great cable providers. Many were given to the people of the US, but they were all of them deceived. In the land of Mordor, in the fires of Mount Doom, the dark Lord Sauron forged in secret a master cable provider, to control all others and into, he poured his cruelty, his malice, and and the worst fucking customer service imaginable, its name was Comcast. One by one respectable cable providers fell to the power of the Comcast. But there were some who resisted. A last alliance of Disgruntled customers and AT&T employees marched against the tyranny of Comcast and in the parking lot of Comcast's headquarters they fought for the right to choose a respectable cable service.
Comcast by Satan's Almighty Penis July 27, 2014
Comcast
A supposed digital service provider employing a business plan from the stone age set up to do nothing other than rape it's customers. Instead of allowing consumers to choose their own content packages, they force 90% extra bullshit fluff added to the 10% of services you actually want for ridiculously outlandish prices.
Running with a completely streamlined skeletoned system of equipment and hardware that's not kept up to date with modern firmware or standards whatsoever, nothing is ever working the way it's intended and if anything goes wrong expect to be ignored until it starts working again, which can take hours if not days at a time.
Line signal strength is a joke and overtaxed during peak hours so if you're neighbor is looking up porn while you wish to game online expect frequent lag and disconnections. Switching stations have no stand by systems or backups in place so if anything on the Comcast service network goes down you have no services, such as Television, Internet and Phone.
Running with a completely streamlined skeletoned system of equipment and hardware that's not kept up to date with modern firmware or standards whatsoever, nothing is ever working the way it's intended and if anything goes wrong expect to be ignored until it starts working again, which can take hours if not days at a time.
Line signal strength is a joke and overtaxed during peak hours so if you're neighbor is looking up porn while you wish to game online expect frequent lag and disconnections. Switching stations have no stand by systems or backups in place so if anything on the Comcast service network goes down you have no services, such as Television, Internet and Phone.
1. I just got booted from Xbox Live! Again! Fucking asshat next door must be jerking off!
2. Comcast is down, better call it in to complain... oh wait, Comcast also provides the phone, and since the service is down the phone isn't working.
3. Customer service has had me on hold for hours! They must not have any staff to handle anything because they expect no one to call when the service is down because it disables the customer's phone! Guess they don't realize we still have cellphones! Oh I just got through... nope they don't speak English and promptly hung up on me!
4. I've just pinged the local switching station's IP and I'm getting not half the rate for which I'm paying for their supposed "high-speed" internet... customer service tells me that I'm paying for "up-to" a certain speed. I'm thinking about only paying "up-to" a certain amount of my fucking bill! Fuck Comcast, I'm cancelling this shit!
2. Comcast is down, better call it in to complain... oh wait, Comcast also provides the phone, and since the service is down the phone isn't working.
3. Customer service has had me on hold for hours! They must not have any staff to handle anything because they expect no one to call when the service is down because it disables the customer's phone! Guess they don't realize we still have cellphones! Oh I just got through... nope they don't speak English and promptly hung up on me!
4. I've just pinged the local switching station's IP and I'm getting not half the rate for which I'm paying for their supposed "high-speed" internet... customer service tells me that I'm paying for "up-to" a certain speed. I'm thinking about only paying "up-to" a certain amount of my fucking bill! Fuck Comcast, I'm cancelling this shit!
Comcast
Comcast by Tight_pussy January 10, 2014
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Yap Trap
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Blexas
Texas is categorized as a swing state in presidential elections, but has voted for Republicans more times than for Democrats in recent history. As such, as demographics change political alignments, some Democrats believe that Texas will vote blue, or Democratic, due to their Hispanic and African American voters, who often align themselves with the Democratic Party's liberal wing.
Blexas has been cited as possible in the upcoming decades, but only if Democrats continue to win the Hispanic vote in bigger margins.
Blexas has been cited as possible in the upcoming decades, but only if Democrats continue to win the Hispanic vote in bigger margins.
Ratfucker
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026
countrypolitan
Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026