Crud Muffin

A large puffy poop turd

Michelle : Oh Mark I sure did miss your hard dick inside me Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Mark : Oh Michelle I sure did miss your soft pussy YEE! YEE! YEE! (splat) OOPS!
Michelle : OOPS! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL?
Mark : Oh nothing just a little Crud Muffin come on let's cuddlefuck!
Michelle : LITTLE IT'S THE SIZE OF A SOFTBALL? You pooped a Crud Muffin on my leg while you was pounding my pussy! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY BED!
Mark : Uh I believe this is our bed and I want to cuddlefuck!
Michelle : Uh we are divorced and this is my bed GET THE FUCK OUT!
Mark : (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : And take your god damn Crud Muffin with you! (splat)
Steve : Hey Mark you look so sexy with that Crud Muffin on your face Mmmm!
Mark : Wow Steve thanks! (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : MARK WHY THE HELL IS SOME GUY LICKING YOUR FACE AND RUBBING YOUR COCK!
Mark : I don't know but it feel's kinda nice! (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : GROSS! Im calling the cops!
Steve : You know Mark in prison you can get fucked in the ass and blow Crud Muffins everywhere!
Mark : Wow that sounds kinda nice! (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : Hello Police two gay guy's broke into my house and there are Crud Muffins everywhere!
Steve : Mmmm! Crud Muffins! (wink)

by SlopNChop November 30, 2018

Bigger Than Christmas

Generally something of an epic proportion larger than life status.

Kayla : Hey Jake wanna a blowjob!
Kiersten : Well since Kiersten's not around I guess!
Kayla : O wow your cock's Bigger Than Christmas!
Jake : Yeah I guess I'm blessed!
Kayla : MMMM! MMMM! MMMMM!
Jake : Ahhhh! Ahhhh! Ahhhh!
Kiersten : Get your hands off my man's dick before I rip you an asshole Bigger Than Christmas!
Steve : Wow Jake your penis is Bigger Than Christmas! Ahhhhhh! Ahhhhhh! Ahhhhhh!
Kiersten : JAKE PULL UP YOUR PANTS!

by SlopNChop August 21, 2017

Cum

A warm creamy liquid developed in a guy's balls then released through his penis

Kaylee : Oh Jake are you going to Cum for me?
Scott : Uh my name is Scott!
Kaylee : Oh who give's a fuck who you are just Cum for me!
Scott : Uh Ok! Ahhh! Ahhh! Ahhh! Oh Lucy!
Kaylee : STOP! Who The Fuck Is Lucy?
Scott : She's the first girl I ever Cum for Mmmm! She had long brown hair, blue eyes, puffy breast's, long legs,!
Kaylee : I don't care just fucking Cum for me!
Scott : Uh Ok! Ahhhhh! Ahhhhhh! Ahhhhhh! Oh Lucy!
Kaylee : Uhh! Uhh! Uhhh! Uhhhhhhhh! Oh Jake HARDER! HARDER!
Chad : O Wow sounds like Jake is about to Cum for some girl named Lucy in the closet!
Steve : O God Damn! Uhhh! Uhhh! Uhhhh!
Kiersten : Hey guy's what's going on?
Steve : Jake is in the closet and about to Cum for Lucy!
Kiersten : I Will Fucking Killl Him! MOVE!!! WHAT THE FUCK!
Kaylee : Uhhhhhhhhhhh! Uhhhhhhhhh! Uhhhhhhhhh!
Scott : Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Oops I Came on the floor!
Kaylee : God Damn't Jake you were supposed to Cum in me!
Kiersten : Wow Jake looks like Scott and Lucy looks like Kaylee!
Chad : Wow Kaylee nice bush!
Steve : Wow Scott nice dick!
Kaylee : Shut the fucking door you perves!
Scott : Splat! Splat! Splat!
Kaylee : Damn't Scott can't you wait to Cum in me?
Steve : Mmmm! CUM!!!! (wink)

by SlopNChop October 02, 2018

Fart Fuck

When two people are having sex and the dick makes a fart sound while it's thursting the pussy or anus!

Kiersten : Oh Yeah! Fuck Yeah! Harder! Harder! Harder! I'm Cumming! I'm Cumming!
Chad: Ahhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhhhh! Splat! Splat! Splat!
Kiersten : Did you just fart?
Chad : No it was just a Fart Fuck no gas was actually released!
Kiersten: Thank god cause that would be gross!

by SlopNChop January 30, 2017

Cum

A sticky goo that squirts out of a guy's penis when he becomes sexually aroused.

Craig : O wow check out Kiersten she's wearing tight gym shorts & a little white tank top today Ahhhhhhh!
Chad : Oh Yeah! And don't you just love her blue eyes & long blonde hair! Ahhhhhhh!
Craig : Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Chad : Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Craig : Damn I need to go clean this Cum out of my underwear!
Chad : I think I will go rub Kiersten's shoulders, smell her hair & Cum some more!
Chad : Mmmmm! Ohhh! Ohhhh! Ahhhh! Ahhhh!
Kiersten : Chad what the fuck are you doing?
Chad : Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Kiersten : Did you just Cum?
Chad : I can't help it your just so gorgeous! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Kiersten : Well just keep your Cum in your pant's umkay!
Kaylee : Wow I wish I could make guy's Cum like that!
Steve : Hey Kaylee! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Kiersten : Wow Kaylee you made Steve Cum!
Kaylee : Uh Gross!

by SlopNChop December 06, 2017

Boner

When the penis grows and get's stiff due to a sexual arouse usually this is the best time to have sex or receive a blowjob.

Kiersten : Hey Jake could you brush my hair I was in hurry and didn't have time before I got to work!
Jake : Sure baby Ahhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhh! Ohhh! Ohhh!
Kiersten : Oh baby did I give you a boner!
Jake : Yes your hair is so silky and soft just the touch of it made my penis expand!
Kiersten : Well lets not waste it keep brushing and I suck on it!
Jake : Ohhh! Ahhhhhhhhhh! Ohhh!
Kiersten : Mmmmmmmmmmm! Mmmmmmmmm! Ahhh!
Chad : Oh wow Jake's brushing Kiersten's hair and she's sucking his dick time to spank the old monkey!
Steve : Hey Chad I see you have a Boner how about I help you with that!
Chad : Sure that would be great then I can focus on Kiersten's beautiful hair!
Steve : Mmmmmm! Mmmmmm! Mmmmmm! Ahhhh!
Chad : Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Kiersten : Chad what the fuck! Were you getting a boner off at me and Jake again!
Chad : No!

Jake : Then why were you staring at us while Steve was sucking your dick?
Steve : Hey guys what's up!
Kiersten : Go wipe the cum off your face asshole!

by SlopNChop October 14, 2017

Ohhh! Ahhh!

The sound a girl makes when a guy is pounding her pussy

Lacy : Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh!
Jake : O Wow! I'm sorry is Kiersten around?
Lacy : No she went to the mall I'm Lacy her cousin!
Jake : O do you always lay on the couch naked and finger yourself?
Lacy : Quite often you see I don't have a boyfriend to pleasure me!
Jake : Well I guess I could help you out since you are her cousin!
Lacy : Really! Oh your cock is so huge!
Jake : Mmmm! Your so yummy just like Kiersten!
Lacy : Ohhh! Ahhh! Ohhh! Ahhh! Ohhh! Ahhh!

Jake : Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Lacy : I want you to cum inside me! Ohhh! Ahhh!
Jake : Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Kiersten : Jake Get Your Fuckin Cock Out Of My Cousin!
Lacy : Ohhh! Ahhh!
Kiersten : NOW!

by SlopNChop November 06, 2017