7 definitions by topmountain

The amish pimp is in charge of gathering all the amish women in his community that no man wants to marry and pimps them in the local village brothels for a profit.

He has a large beard, wears a big asmish hat and a sheep wool coat. All his hookers ride around his pimped out buggy with a blue grass band sorround system in the back.
The amish pimp is not a man to bargain with when it comes to his ho's. He represents Madison County Hustling inc.
by topmountain October 1, 2010
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When a male ejaculates too soon in his parters anus/vagina, leaving a tremendous amount of cum that ends up clogging the entire hole up thus ending in early retirement. Once the anus or vagina is clogged up with jizz you are fucked my friend because you're cock can't go in!
Last night Romeo and Juliet were fucking but it all ended in tragedy after that bitch went into early retirement.
by topmountain August 15, 2010
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saturday morning slut- when you wake up after a wild party the next day only to find a trashy slut next to you in the bed. The bed is wet and there is usually a rubber under the sheets.
If you have more drinks than your liver can handle and black out in a Philly apartment then you are most likely to experience a saturday morning slut.
by topmountain October 18, 2010
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The obama excuse is used when somebody accuses you of racism in a public area like work or something. For example, an employee named Tyrone feels that he was racially harrased by his fat white redneck boss Ermey at walmart.
The obama excuse is best used to get out of situations when someone accuses you of racism like in a traffic stop.

example bellow
Tyrone: "Mr. Ermey, I am done cleaning the bathroom and pushing carts, what would you like me to work on next?"

Ermey: " How about you pick them "cotton" socks boy?"

Tyrone: "what da fuck?"
sometime later
news reporter: A walmart employee is sueing walmart for 5 million dollars in damages due to racist comments and harrasment by a manager.

Lawyer: " By the holly bible of god, Mr. Ermey Are you racist towards black people?"

Ermey: " Not me, I voted for obama!"

Lawyer: "see ,see your honor, my client is not racist he voted for obama, see!!"

greedy lawyer:"The obama excuse saved walmart once agian in court, yea!"

Ermey: " No way, I voted for Obama and he is black!"
by topmountain August 18, 2010
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Obama's re- election depends on him looking darker, that way he can be more appealing to the African American community and get their vote in 2012. President Obama recentley took a vacation to Panama City for a swim and to prove the water is clean.
Obama: " Man, I need to look more black ,so all the niggas can vote fo me!"

Kanye West: " Try the Obama Spill Darkening Solution my nigga, all it takes is a swim in the Gulf of Mexico and the black oil will turn you're skin darker, watch out fo them gay fish tho!"
The Obama Spill Darkening Solution works by adding oil spill water in your skin, waiting 5 to 10 minutes and the last part envolves getting a tan for another 10 minutes.

another interesting fact: The obama darkening solution helped white people scam the Alaskan government during the exxon valdez oil spill by turning them dark like the inuit people so they could get a compensation check for their polluted beaches.
by topmountain August 18, 2010
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Christian Sex: No blowjobs, no pussy eating,no ass eating, no positions, no facials, no costumes,no lesbians and no threesomes. You can only give it to her in the vagina and there's no condom or pills involved so you will most likely get her knocked up.
"Man,Christian Sex is so fucking boring." No wonder why priest are always molesting altar boys and cults committing suicide.
by topmountain February 12, 2011
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When a mobster orders you to plant explosives to a gangsters property in an act of revenge.If the bastard is a traitor,thieve or rat then give him a blowjob. You can blowjob a car, a house or somebody's wife.
Big Vennie:" Hey Frankie, that bastard Luigi boy owes me $20,000 in cocaine. Go to his place at night when he is in bed and give his ferrari a blowjob!

Frankie: "Alright boss." (plants explosives, then bang!)

Luigi boy: " mamma mia!"
by topmountain August 18, 2010
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