A thing which is the opposite of what it is presumed to be. An action which is intended to achieve one result and yet achieves its opposite.
Jack and Babs were puzzled that their daughter, already well past forty, seemed to lack any motivation, ambition or interest. They had always done everything for her, 'helped' her with her homework, pulled strings to get her into school, given her a car for graduation. They'd even bought her a nice apartment and set up an annuity so she wouldn't have to worry, never understanding that their 'caring' was an antifact, which, instead of enabling her, was crippling her.
when you're holding up your phone and making faces at it, as though you are taking a selfie, but you're really taking a picture of the person across from you or the wall or anything else that seems interesting but you don't want to be caught dead taking a picture of.
This action is often made more convincing by wiggling the eyebrows or opening the mouth, to pretend you're trying to get a Snapchat filter to work.
FRIEND A: "Did you just take a stealthie of me?"
FRIEND B (turning phone around): "no I was just using snapchat's new filter, see?"