Skip to main content
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.
Witten is the collective name for a group of Winnets.
A winnet is a tuft of shit, left clinging to your anal hair. Witten can be used as the plural for winnet.
My mate Dave did not just have the odd winnet, he had a manifestation of witten weighing his arse hair down.

Dave you witten ridden fool, wipe your fooking arse properly, you filthy cunt.
Witten by The_List July 23, 2020

Witten Smack 

A witten smack is when you take a wet kitten and smack somebody across the face with it. If you do not have a wet kitten in hand feel free to lick the back of your hand and give the person a good backhand to the face. It was invented by a coupple of bored teens that decided to have a wet kitten fight.
Girn:Oh my gwash I'm like so hot and like everyone loves me!!!
Guy:You better shut up before I witten smack you!
Witten Smack by Killzark March 24, 2009

witten joplin 

Really awesome has so much swag and if SUPER AWESOME.
witten joplin by Flappy bird king January 31, 2014

Ed Witten 

(i) A Theoretical Physicist at the Institute for Advanced Study, Princeton who specializes in String Theory. Widely regarded as Einstein's successor, he is unquestionably a genius.
(ii) A person of super-human intellect.
(iii) A synonym for genius.
- B+ in Calculus? No Ed Witten, but not bad.
- Ha! Look at Joey trying get Christie's number. Doesn't take an Ed Witten to tell him that she's out of his league.
- Oxford is full of mini Ed Wittens.
Ed Witten by WhiteAndNerdy May 11, 2012

Ed Witten 

A real smart dude. One of the founding fathers of string theory or superstring theory or M-Theory or some theory involving strings. Nearly became an economist, but saw the light.

Basically, cross between Albert Einstein, Stephen Hawking, Richard Feynman and a supercomputer.

Ed Witten is a god-like figure in the Theoretical Physics world.
Ed Witten's a genius. Bet he gets all kinds of girls.

Geeeez, my Tv's broken again. I bet Ed Witten could work out how to fix it.

"What's a Calabi-Yau Threefold"?

"Bro, Ask Ed Witten"

Ed Witten's brain is so powerful that he can compute the last digit of pi while doing my long division homework.

Not even Ed Witten could work out how to score with Julie.
Ed Witten by MacroBlaster May 11, 2012

Ed Witten 

(i) According to Time Magazine (and Wikipedia) he's the greatest Physicist in the world at this point. Instrumental in developing string theory and known for his planet sized brain.

(ii) Synonym for a dumbass
Dude, how did you figure out how to get Christie's Number?

I asked Ed Witten, he figured it out.

Nice work Ed Witten! Now my car smells of ten day old guacamole and burritos.
Ed Witten by MixMasterMax June 17, 2012
More from Urban Dictionary

piddlefart

verb. To waste time doing nothing.
Instead of doing my homework, I decided to piddlefart around for two hours.
piddlefart by Rene April 25, 2005
Word of the Day on October 9, 2026
anyone who succeeds in disgracing/over indulging themselves in the throws of clubland
28 hours and 4 clubs later, gurning for england but still refusing to go home - a total wrongun!!
wrongun by bevvers March 21, 2007
Word of the Day on October 8, 2026

square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.
"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."
square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004
Word of the Day on October 7, 2026
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."
Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014
Word of the Day on October 6, 2026

trucker's tan 

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
Load more