First President of the United States of
America. Led the Continental Army to victory over the British and all those damn mercenaries they hired. Also known as the 'Dollar bill guy'.
George Washington never did chop down a cherry tree, and this rumor was believed to be started by some school teacher with the knowledge of Mr. Garrison. He did, however,
sleep everywhere, and it is unlikely that he just slept, since the chicks were getting a little bored with 'bundling'.
Boy: Hello?
Geo. Washington: Yeah? Whadda' you want?
Boy: Are you
Mr. Washington?
George Washington?
Geo. Washington: Is this another one of you damn kids looking for a meal ticket?
Boy: But my mom says....
Geo. Washington: Look kid... I get a lot of this. The phone's ringing day and night, which is creepy since we've got another 100 years before its invention. But never mind that. Who's
your mother, anyway?
Boy: Betsy Churchbottomfeeder.
Geo. Washington: Okay! I did spend the night at her house, but slept alone. Tell
your mother to call an attorney. She ain't gettin' shit.
Boy: Oh, woe is me! A bastard once again! Boo-hoo, boo-hoo.
Geo. Washington: Lemme give you Jefferson's number. He falls for this shit all the time.
Boy: Thanks, bro!
