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A short, awkwardly dressed dog and pig molester who searches for random encounters at spinx gas stations
The cops cornered a Varnum at spinx last night but he shagged two pigs before they caught him- goat scrumper--
by Dsafddd November 15, 2016
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Coffee addicted homosexual from Seattle, WA. Loves democrats, liberal politics, men (especially gays), cleveland steamers (on themselves), tossing salad, OKC Thunder, and little boys. Vocabulary consisting of Dude, No, Rad, Rog, Shred, Gnar Gnar Pow Pow, and Profanities. Often found wandering the streets with a confused look on their face or in front of a juke box or Itunes changing the song every 10 seconds.
I caught this Varnum trying to play hide the sausage with a schnauzer.
by Nick Varnum February 08, 2010
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