An epic phone that will make all iPhone users cry. This phone will give you bragging rights and will destroy the iPhone. If you show this phone to girls, they will want to suck your dick and want to be "friends" with you. It will make you like a god. You will become a Stud.
Person 1: Dude, tight ass phone. What is it, bro?
Person 2: Bitch, it is the Sumsung Epic 4G . It owns the fucking iPhone. It makes it look like a piece of SHIT.
Person 1: I agree bro.
A perfectly acceptable replacement for the aged and decrepit "something". A word which hasn't found the decency to remove itself from the English language.