Skissors 

A better way of pronouncing scissors

Bill: hand me the skissors

Jeffer: sure thing mate

Skissors by Skissors man February 22, 2020

Skissors 

An alternate way of saying scissors.

Could you pass me those skissors some I can cut this paper?

Skissors by Brittany Lynn March 6, 2007

scissors theater 

When someone pretends they are opposed to another person, but they are not, and they actually just do it for something.
Based upon the Brazilian series "Teatro das Tesouras", that says that the politicians in the elections only pretend to be against each other, and they do not have an actual ideology, just hunger for power.

Guy: Why is he pretending to defend something? He just wants to have that thing!
Dude: Another actor in the scissors theater.

scissors theater by theomegapyrope July 10, 2020

I need scissors! 61!

Towards the end of Konami's Metal Gear Solid 2 (PS2), a computer AI operating under the alias of Colonel Campbell becomes infected with a computer virus codenamed "GW." The virus proceeds to scramble the AI's memory and logic, causing the AI Campbell imposter to utter numerous phrases of complete nonsense, among them the phrase "...I need scissors! 61!" It is part of a longer quote, listed below.

The phrase "I need scissors!" has no particular or coherent meaning, as it is simply the product of a horribly scrambled AI.

"I hear its amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork does a raw blink on Hari Kiri Rock. I need scissors! 61!"

I need scissors! 61! by Siegfried Zaga May 23, 2005

Rock Paper Scissors

One of the most pointless and nonsensical game used to make small decisions.

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell cant paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why isn't notebook paper constantly suffocating students while they take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to beat me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole.

Rock Paper Scissors by HAS 2006 December 8, 2004

Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock 

Scissors cuts paper; Paper covers rock; Rock crushes lizard; Lizard poisons Spock; Spock smashes scissors; Scissors decapitates lizard; Lizard eats paper; Paper disproves Spock; Spock vaporizes rock; And as it always has- Rock crushes scissors.

During a demanding game of Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock, Arnold snarled, "DAMN IT! Somebody is going to have to choose something other than Spock for this to work!"

Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock by thesquidge July 19, 2009

Sissors 

a dump stupid idiot that cant spell the simplest fucking word, scissors.

p1: So I heard Bob spells scissors like sissors! What a dumbass!
p2: Hahaha!

Sissors by Gerrets October 18, 2020