Plinker plonker 

somebody who causes but complete annoyance but still has a use

look at banasic, he's such a plinker plonker

Plinker plonker by biggestbafoonbingus69 June 4, 2023

plonker 

dope, idiot, moron, wally, pillock, dunderhead, dimwit

You are such a plonker, Rodney.

plonker by Jackson Pillock January 13, 2003

plonker 

the term plonker started out as a reference to someone who was forever drunk on cheap wine (cheap wine is nicknamed plonk) this person was usualy a homeless person, or poor person.

today the term plonker is a very light hearted insult. Its not even seen as an insult, its like calling someone a wally. Its in no way ment maliciously. you call someone a plonker when they say or do something stupid.

bob - why didnt my food cook ?
john - you never turned on the oven, you plonker.

plonker by Emperor Bubba February 1, 2005

Pulling my plonker 

Plonker is British slang for penis. Literally pull my plonker is to masturbate. But nowadays the expression someone is pulling my plonker is used with the meaning of someone is messing with me or trying to make fun of me.

This Brit told me in the UK the weather is always sunny and hot. 0bviously he was just pulling my plonker

Pulling my plonker by Teleco November 26, 2016

Plonker 

A stupid person

Grace!!! You absolute plonker

Plonker by Sugaronastick December 16, 2019

plonker 

a willy! or a dopey person

rodney u plonker!

plonker by deepcoveruk February 3, 2003

Meaty plonker 

1. An abundantly large penis, possessed of both girth and width

2. A large stool that lands with a loud "plop" and sinks to the bottom of the toilet

3. An overweight or well-built stupid person

"Look at the meaty plonker at that guy, he'd break your pelvis"

"Some sneaky bastard left a meaty plonker in the toilet, I'll smoke him out"

"Get off the road you meaty plonker!! What are you trying to do, get us all killed?!"

Meaty plonker by Ms Mongaliska January 5, 2014