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Paper Towel 

Noun
A normal sized towel used to dry things that are wet. The Paper Towel is not particularly useful for projects involving large masses of fluids. It typically falls apart following first few uses because of its limited durability seeing as how it is only made of paper. It is commonly associated with drying humans, drying dogs, and drying cats. It is typical to go through several Paper Towels when drying large breed dogs following a bath or similar activity
"Oh no, I spilled my jug of lemonade!" said Doug.
"Don't worry, I have my Paper Towel right here,"John replied.
"Thank goodness, let's just hope I don't spill all my other jugs because your Paper Towel won't be able to handle that much fluid," Doug said.

"Doug, I just got out of the shower. Can you get me a Paper Towel?" John inquired.
Doug replied, " Do you just want one?"
"Of course, would you ever use more than one normal 100% cotton towel after bathing?" John said.
Paper Towel by Not sarcastic October 22, 2013

Paper Towel 

A Whore ass bitch who is only good in bed once and then you toss her away
Hey did you get with Lisa last night?

Ya but she Was a paper towel so I Just left after it was done.
Paper Towel by BatmanDougie December 1, 2011

Paper towel 

When someone is getting on your nerves and keeps talking to you you say, "are you callin me a paper towel?"
Sammi says to Casey after she keeps going on about her boyfriend. Sammi says " are you calling me a paper towel?"
Paper towel by Casey and Sammi February 27, 2004

Paper Towel Karate 

What people do when they are flailing their arms about an automatic paper towel dispenser that is hard to activate.
I just witnessed a guy do paper towel karate in the mens room for five minutes! I just used my pants.
Paper Towel Karate by Wafsnipes23 September 17, 2011

Paper Towel Wanker 

A “Paper Towel Wanker” is usually a male. Someone who prefers to “relieve stress” with a Paper Towel. Usually their name is Hank. Or Will.
Damn, Hank goin AT it wit dat paper towel roll, he’s a real Paper Towel Wanker

paper towel math 

Manipulating math so the numbers favor your goal like paper towel companies’ use when advertising that 6 roles = 12 roles.
John from accounting uses paper towel math to figure out next year’s fiscal budget.
paper towel math by Nick Steele August 7, 2021