I.T. SHITS

Name: I.T. SHITS Mug
Brand: Urban Dictionary
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A PERSON who uses their laptop on the toilet.

Thing 1: Hey, could you pass me some toilet paper? I have to finish my paper
Thing 2: One those I.T. Shits, huh?
Thing 1: Yep
Thing 2: Just make sure you don't get no shit on the keyboard.

I.T. SHITS by Thatfatgirl1985. December 5, 2017

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I Don't Give Two Shits

An expression, when said, means you really do not care about what someone is saying, or what's going on around you. Recommended to be said sarcastically.

Shithead Neighbor: Hey Tim!
You: Yeah, hi.
Shithead Neighbor: I won the lottery jackpot yesterday! 40 million dollars for me!
You: Well guess what? I don't give two shits if you win 40 million, or 40 cents. Get the fuck out of my face please.

I Don't Give Two Shits by ChronicClub August 18, 2016

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I don't give a shits

An ailment that causes one to not care about the consequences of their actions or give up on their goals.

"Hey man, you're getting fat again. What happened to your diet?"
"The I don't give a shits came early this year."

I don't give a shits by Gleen707 April 26, 2019

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I don't give two shits

Way of saying, I really could care less for this shit, and shut the fuck up. Wrapped up in one little phrase.

Dude #1: Hey, can you go water my plants while I'm gone?

Dude #2: I don't give two shits about your damn plants!

I don't give two shits by Waffleboy2c7 March 27, 2010

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I don't give two and a half shits

You really, REALLY don't care about what someone just told you.

Brody: Hey, I just found this really funny video I wanna show you, it's about this-

Ryan: I don't GIVE two and a half shits, alright?!

I don't give two and a half shits by MCGONN June 17, 2009

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my asshole hurts from taking shits that I don’t give

When you REALLY don’t care about anything/anyone

Toxic little kid: Dude you suck ass at this game. I don’t understand why anyone wants to play with you or even talk to you.
Me: Bro my asshole hurts from taking shits that I don’t give.
Everyone in the voice channel: *laughs*

my asshole hurts from taking shits that I don’t give by Fireguy47 September 25, 2020

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I don't give two and a half shits

Combining a reference to two and a half men and the fact that you care so little about what the other person's saying.

-Hey, guess what I was doing last night?
-You know what? I don't give two and a half shits!

I don't give two and a half shits by Deathgleaner May 24, 2010

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square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.

"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."

square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004

Word of the Day on October 7, 2026

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Bunhead

A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.

"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."

Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014

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trucker's tan

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.

I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.

trucker's tan by population361 May 30, 2006

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kidulting

The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys

Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!

kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025

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Boffin

British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.

According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.

Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023

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Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.

I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.

Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026

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