Dick Jesus

Dick Jesus- Dick Game so good, females drop to their knees like Mary Magdeline at the cross.

My home girl got mad because her friend calls me “Dick Jesus.”

by Louis Arceneaux May 09, 2020

Dick Jesus

A man who believes his penis is God's gift to the world, but he does not know how to use it properly. A man who does not know how to please women sexually.

This term originated in 2018 when a group of women were describing very disappointing sexual encounters with men.

Monica: "I heard you got lucky with Trevor last night!"
Kate: "... we had sex..."
Sara: "Why the longface? I heard he was well endowed!"
Kate: "ya... but he's a total Dick Jesus"
Monica: "eew! Dick Jesus men are the WORST!"
Sara: "I don't care how beautiful his penis is, if he's a Dick Jesus, I'm not gonna waste my time."

by Ovary Actor October 20, 2018

limp dick jesus

A nick name for someone who is stupid and makes bad choices

He is such a limp dick Jesus

by Limp d. Jesus September 12, 2017

dicks like jesus

When your dick is as awesome as Jesus.

My dick plays on the double feature screen, your dick went straight to DVD. We got dicks like Jesus

by wegottalettheworldknow June 26, 2008

Jesus dick

Dick so good that it heals all of your ailments

Girl: I thought you weren't going out tonight because you had a headache

Friend: I wasn't but then I hit up Ryan... He got that Jesus dick

by Dagger23 March 02, 2014

Jesus Dick

Getting an erection after busting, and your penis "died" but rises again.

"Man, I had already came twice, but I looked at that booty again and got Jesus dick."

by TheLittleEngine September 15, 2015

Jesus Dick

An exclamation or interjection of anguish, usually that which is caused by another person's idiocy. Mainly used on its own, not as part of another sentence.

Primo - "I can't get the toilet to stop running and can't find the plug to unplug it."

Secundo - "Jesus dick, why are you so stupid!"

by Billis Tedward September 12, 2011