Cryopractor 

(Noun) kr-eye-oh-praahk-tore :

A backromancer with magical ice spells and philososcienceligions that freeze spinal disconcordatio ns and mishap-happenings rather than traditional suplexes, mortal kumbuht fatalitees, or mechanically induced midget pornalities...

A surgeon who stays one step ahead of the back pains and brains with migraines by using icy rains and frosty Janes...

And if they can't fix yah...you get placed in stasis for 25,000 billion years until new technowizards can blurbble their trifling yargabble and make boo-boo go bye-bye.

"My old-new-now Cryopracticioner ate a baby demon's head the other week...I told them my thoracic hurt like Hebrews did in Mordor, but he told me an Irish tale of mythical toilet stomps aaaaaand froze my pee-pee.
The Cryopractor works on mysterious ways I guess, yes sir."

"Yes, quite a hexaposterial point of view"

Cryopractor by TheNinjaneer May 12, 2015

chyropractor 

n : a therapist who practices chyropractic, it is the official decreed job title of the Anti-Christ within the multidimentional corporation 'Lucither and Son'.

Chyropractic: A system of therapy in which mankind is considered the result of abnormal function of God's nervous system. The method of treatment usually involves manipulation of the UN and other governmental bodys.

Chyropractors are generally believed by trade unions to be highly underpaid, and have been pushing for a salary raise since the stock market crash of the 80s.

"I went to see the Chyropractor yesterday, its amazing the way Satan sucked my soul out also solved my back problem."

"I sold my soul to the devil, now everyone believes I'm God and the ache has gone from my shoulder"

chyropractor by simply_burb June 15, 2006

caropractor 

A highly-skilled worker at an auto-body shop who specializes in performing front-end alignments, straightening out frames and panels, and generally aiding in restoring the correct positioning of bent/warped vehicle-parts.

Off-roading enthusiast: My 4X4 got kinda bent outta shape after doing the 100km Baja slalom, so I hadda take her to a caropractor to get her runnin' smooth and straight again.

caropractor by QuacksO August 11, 2018