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congrasturbating 

Creating a problem that affects millions of people, then praising oneself for fixing only the small part of the problem that affects you and then masturbating.
congrasturbating - what your congress did today

Congratsturbating

Creating a problem that affects millions of people, then praising oneself for fixing only the small part of the problem that affects you and then masturbating.

(from April 29th, 2013 The Daily Show with Jon Steward) - featuring the Urban Dictionary word "Procrasturbating"
Sen. Susan Collins (R): "It's nice to know, that when we work together we really can solve problems!"

Jon: "Yeah, how nice from you - I think I have a new word for the Urban Dictionary: Congratsturbating."

Congratsturbating

Creating a problem that affects millions of people, then praising oneself for fixing the small part of the problem that affects you and then masturbating.

Coined by Jon Stewart
'Did you hear Susan Collins saying how proud she was that Congress passed a bill to speed up air travel?'

'Yeah that bitch is just congratsturbating.'
Congratsturbating by Umbeeee April 29, 2013
Word of the Day on May 5, 2013

Contrasturbation 

A portmanteau word, comprised of words "contrast" and "masturbation". The word means to give way more value/relevance to different things, just because of their contrastful nature. The contrast may show itself in many ways, such as opinions which go against "the norm", or even drawing something cute as "badass". It is a phenomenon typically occuring in art, but also within perceptions of people.
-Mark is always talking about how everybody should throw away their money and live in the wild. What do you think got into him?
-Contrasturbation. That's what got into him.

Contrasturbation 

A portmanteau word, comprised of words "contrast" and "masturbation". The word means to give way more value/relevance to different things, just because of their contrastful nature. The contrast may show itself in many ways, such as opinions which go against "the norm", or even drawing something cute as "badass". It is a phenomenon typically occuring in art, but also within perceptions of people.
-Mark is always talking about how everybody should throw away their money and live in the wild. What do you think got into him?
-Contrasturbation. That's what got into him.
More from Urban Dictionary

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.
Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."
Word of the Day on September 25, 2026
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"
crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
Word of the Day on September 24, 2026
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
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