Congratsturbating

Creating a problem that affects millions of people, then praising oneself for fixing only the small part of the problem that affects you and then masturbating.

(from April 29th, 2013 The Daily Show with Jon Steward) - featuring the Urban Dictionary word "Procrasturbating"

Sen. Susan Collins (R): "It's nice to know, that when we work together we really can solve problems!"

Jon: "Yeah, how nice from you - I think I have a new word for the Urban Dictionary: Congratsturbating."

by Al P Trollolol April 30, 2013

Congratsturbating

Creating a problem that affects millions of people, then praising oneself for fixing the small part of the problem that affects you and then masturbating.

Coined by Jon Stewart

'Did you hear Susan Collins saying how proud she was that Congress passed a bill to speed up air travel?'

'Yeah that bitch is just congratsturbating.'

by Umbeeee April 29, 2013

congrasturbating

Creating a problem that affects millions of people, then praising oneself for fixing only the small part of the problem that affects you and then masturbating.

congrasturbating - what your congress did today

by Jon Stewart the twntyfourth April 30, 2013

Congratsubating

Masterbating after accoplishing something, or after being proud of ones' self

A guy has been crushing on a girl for a while and finally get her number/a date

Guy 1: Dude im so happy, this girl is so hot.
Guy 2: So what you going to do are u going to call her up

Guy 1: No i think imma head out for a congratsubating session. See you later

GUy 2: WTF MAN!! GROSS

by Idhitthatificould March 16, 2012

Congratsturbation

The act of congratulating one's self, especially if done excessively.

Neil: I'm so awesome! I totally scored the winning goal last night!
Stephen: Stop your congratsturbation, you'll go blind.

by Fraguar September 20, 2012