Coffeemaning

A combination of mansplaining and an obsessive interest in coffee and its brewing techniques, especially one that dominates the personality of men between the ages of 19 and 45, causing them to regard tea, water, and instant coffee drinkers as persons of poor taste.

'Oh god, Sarah, please tell me you didn't ask him about his hobbies.'

'Sadly, I did. He went on and on, extolling the virtues of Aeropressed medium-roast arabica, coffeemaning for almost an hour, and by then, my tea was cold.'

by LarsonNeu June 22, 2023

Coffebeaning

to trick your bed partner into thinking he/her is going to give you oral sex under the duvet, then locking his/her head between your legs and pass gas and faecal matter into their mouth.

Agela: "Oh lord did I not have some fun with Timothy yesterday"
Maggy: "What did you do?"
Angela: "I was totally coffebeaning him in the sanctuary we call our own bedroom. I loved it!"
Maggy: "I want to kiss that sweet mouth of yours, Angela. You know I always loved you. Why don't you love me?"
Angela: "Because you are a hussy. perhaps you should be coffebeand once in a while".
Maggy: "My shitty boyfriend has to soft of a stool to produce the hard pellets needed for such a task"
Angela: "Change his diet to broccoli, that will pas the stool needed to get your relationship up and running again"
Maggy: "but the 'running' is the problem!"
Angela: "You make me laugh, you silly goose!"

by Hiny Peter August 6, 2012

coffeebeaning

The female equivalent of teabagging, where a female would rub her vagina over the victim's face/forehead

"Kerry, that coffeebeaning you gave me totally fucking stank."

by Ahdinko January 9, 2009

coffeenating

Going for a coffee, getting a refill

...Is gone coffeenating

by ihateclownz February 6, 2010