Calmonella

A contagious disease in which you do not make the decision to say things. They just come out.

And there’s no going back. And you get very judgemental stares.

“Did you hear Callum say ‘alrighty roo’?”
“Yeah, he was diagnosed with Calmonella”

Calmonella by thedestructiveturtle November 3, 2019

Mohammed bin Salmonella 

Mohammed bin Salmonella, a.k.a. bin Salman is an inbred crown prince and practically the dictator in an oil-saturated, extreme conservative shithole called Saudi Arabia. He is a toxic and murderous sandnigger who doesn't tolerate criticism, he ordered the murder of journalist Jamal Khashoggi at the Saudi consulate in Istanbul, Turkey. His way of controlling are arrests, torture, rapings and murders, he is behind Saudi Arabian-led intervention in Yemen since 2015 because its authoritarian president (whose name no one remembers) asked for help, so far (2021) the war hasn't been successful for the alliance, being described as a military stalemate, except in one respect, it has only been successful in violating human rights.

- "I assume Mohammed bin Salmonella doesn't suffer from diarrhea, despite his name."
- "I guess you're right, rather the diarrhea suffers from that dune coon."

Mohammed bin Salmonella by O. W. Tongueincheek December 9, 2021

Salmonellafitzgerald 

A disease that causes the infected person to look like Ella Fitzgerald, a famous musician. Another symptom is random and spontaneous "scat" singing. The only known cure is to lick a chimp.

"I have....Salmonellafitzgerald! Ba do boop, zibbidy bop sha waaaahhhh!"

Salmonellafitzgerald by Jsuper John November 8, 2011

ass-salmonella

A common side-effect of using eggwash as anal lube.

Dustin, you shouldn't use eggwas as anal lube with Precious... you're gonna give her ass-salmonella!

ass-salmonella by The Rev NG8 August 4, 2018

salmonella 

A myth perpetuated by the evil to prevent the innocent from enjoying one of life's most simple pleasures.

An Innocent Person Who Has Done No Wrong: Awesome I'm gonna eat this cookie dough!
Satan: No, you'll get salmonella.

salmonella by thelemonwarrior March 9, 2016

Casa de Salmonella 

A vile, wretched or disgusting Mexican restaurant. A truck stop in Wyoming, where they pour a burrito onto your plate out of a can. Any eating establishment where the food will place you in a race with the Devil for the nearest bathroom. A restaurant which, if it caught on fire, would cause cockroaches to stampede out like a heard of buffalo.

A roach-coach with a painting of the Virgin Mary on the side, and at least one missing tire, is the Casa de Salmonella.

Casa de Salmonella by Bloater October 17, 2011

salmonella 

a disease contracted by reptiles that spreads easily to humans. its not good to keep small reptiles around children. do not let them put the reptiles in their mouths. also, you need a protected cage for small reptiles with salmonella, because it can easily seep out and be contracted by humans. small reptiles are illegal in the united states because salmonella was contracted by many americans in the 1970s. DO NOT LET REPTILES WITH SALMONELLA BE PURCHASED! especially if they are not sold through a certified pet store.

"Becky, don't lick the small turtle or else you will contract salmonella"

salmonella by Rebecca N12345 August 5, 2007