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internet slang that only the 'coolest' of kids would use, stands for "almost laughed my fingernails off"
"hey garry, i got an erection in class and had to stand up and give a speech! it was so embarrassing!"

"HAHAHAHAH ALMFO!!!!!!!!!!!!111oneoneshiftoneshifteleven"
ALMFO by 11danus March 6, 2009

ex-almost 

Ex-Almost: Someone who called you baby and were cute with you around your friends — but then there’s the fact that nothing ever followed through. This is what enables us to feel so torn in admitting that no, you didn’t date, but you still kinda feel like you ought to call them your ex.
"Who's that?"
"My ex-almost, we hooked up every week for a month but nothing went past that"
ex-almost by ibeyuranh November 14, 2014
Related Words
ALMFO Alfonso Almond Joy Almond ALMO alfons almond milk Alfonzo Alford Almog

almond mom 

Typically white suburban moms who were 90s girls and never accepted they had an eating disorder, so now they have to make it everyone else’s problem
“A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips is my almond moms favorite mantra”
almond mom by Sydkid765 October 18, 2022
The sexiest beast around. He is literally a boss. He’s hard as fuck and often caught smoking a fag in back of the yard.
Ellis: yo almo wanna smoke some bud in the back g

Almo: yea why not g.
Almo by The busy puda December 12, 2018

Almond Joy 

A black guy who acts white.
You heard Jamal is an almond joy? Black on the outside but white on the inside.
Almond Joy by Squirtle1200 November 10, 2022

almosttoasty 

search it up, it's good and will make you ask your sexuality ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
it's not gay if it's almosttoasty
almosttoasty by 8we6oqd4wq May 13, 2020

almond tofu 

What Xiao from Genshin Impact eats daily in hopes of trying to extend his height from 157 even though he’s 2000 years old.
Why did you make almond tofu, did you realised that you have summoned Xiao accidentally?
almond tofu by nekohwa March 8, 2021
More from Urban Dictionary
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear
hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh
hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026
Word of the Day on September 19, 2026

God Shot 

A chance happening with profound meaning, an unexpected blessing, a "sign".
Dr. Drew on Celebrity Rehab said "All of a sudden what had been just another Hollywood proposal became for him an unexpected blessing, an opportunity for growth. In drug recovery language, that's called a "God shot."
God Shot by Imogen1564 February 25, 2011
Word of the Day on September 18, 2026
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