farmer's delight

A sexual act in which one woman inserts a full corn cob into another's "corn-hole" while the corn-cob-ee is being penetrated by a gonorrhea-infected tracter tail-pipe. The inserter gets rammed by a horse that is suspended above her with an elaborate set of ropes. The horse's initial penetration is after fifteen feet on a zip line. It is forceful. A goat eats the old corn cob afterwards, and is jerked off while it dines.

Please do not do this. If you do, videotape it.

Farmer's delight tonight, Cletusette?

farmer's delight by Stan Greer August 25, 2006

Farmer's Sneeze 

The act of evacuating one nostril while holding the other shut.

Viscous goo dripped from his eye as the result of my well-aimed, farmer's sneeze.

Farmer's Sneeze by Ian B. Hall March 19, 2008

farmer's tan 

A tan where the tan lines are obviously caused by wearing normal clothes outside in the sun for long periods of time, instead of wearing swimwear or more suitable clothes for tanning.

Dude, your chest is so pale compared to your arms. And why are your knees so red? Get rid of that farmer's tan before you come to the beach again, it looks ridiculous!

farmer's tan by kwirk June 11, 2005

Farmer's Cough 

The act of transferring phlegmy saliva into a woman's vagina or a male's anus and then swallowing it back.

I farmer's coughed my boyfriend which made me puke and get a shitty taste.
or
That fuckin Asian slut charged me fifty bucks for farmer's coughing her!

Farmer's Cough by Peppolla September 8, 2009

farmer browned 

To own someone at close range in a first person shooter video game via shotgun.

Oh dammit I just got farmer browned in COD!

farmer browned by farmerbrown-ed November 23, 2010

Farmer's Nail 

Farmer's Nail is to have one or more dirty finger nails and the dirt appears to be typical garden variety "dirt" or potting soil under the nails. However, Farmer's Nail is not regular dirt or soil but is actually feces which is accumulated under one or more finger nails as a direct result of either intentional fingering of a dirty shit plugged anus during a sexual act or from having one or more fingers slip through the toilet paper while wiping one's ass and getting ass dirt or fecal matter under the nails. Having Farmer's Nail does not mean that one did not wash their hands after an anal fingering or after slippage during a wipe job, just that one did not clean the feces from under their nails at the time of the wash job as they may not have known it was present. In most, but not all instances of Farmer's Nail, it is not left under the nail intentionally and is simply an oversight during the clean up process.

Farmer's Nail is also known as Mechanic's Nail which is more frequently used in the automotive industry.

Carl: Hi Gary. What have you been up to? From the looks of those fingers I would say you have been working in the garden this morning?
Gary: No I have not been in the yard working today. (Looking at nails) Oh No Bro. I had the worst Louisiana Tail Drop earlier this morning and made an absolute mess. I was wiping my sharted ass with both hands and my fingers kept slipping through the wet shat paper. Guess it got under the nails.
Carl: That is some nasty shit brahh! You got the worst case of Farmer's Nail I have ever seen. Go get a toothpick or a nail file and dig that shit out. Nasty.

Farmer's Nail by Eaton Holgoode April 13, 2014

Farmer kieran 

A person who goes by the name of kieran who keeps a secret stash of barn porn in his room. He farms his goat every day and twice on sundays. This means that his penis is very sore and over done. this results in a very high amount of smegmaand general cheese.

Kieran farmed his goat so hard it bled.
kierans stash was discovered and he claimed it wanst his, ripped it up and threw it away, he later stuck it back together with farm juice. (cum)

Farmer kieran by Rigel_7 February 5, 2005