An awkward neighbor or boyfriend/girlfriend in your dorm who invites himself/herself to meals, parties, and other social events. Ass monkeys attach themselves to specific groups or individuals by seeing that other individuals are able to invite themselves to events but still be welcomed companions.
Sketchball A: We need to go out the side door. If we don't your ass monkey will come with us to dinner.
Sketchball B: Tru that 'ho. I don't want my ass monkey fucking up my Pimp Committee.
Mutual Friend of Sketchballs A and B: I swear Sketchball B. If your ass monkey comes to one more meal with us I'm going to jump off a bridge.
Sketchball B: Tru that 'ho. I don't want my ass monkey fucking up my Pimp Committee.
Mutual Friend of Sketchballs A and B: I swear Sketchball B. If your ass monkey comes to one more meal with us I'm going to jump off a bridge.
by I-Heart-Shiksas December 19, 2007
by The Artful Codger May 18, 2004
by asaws11 July 21, 2009
A small monkey used to aid a disabled person. They are very well trained and perform such tasks as fetching food, turning lights on and off, and retrieving assorted small objects.
My helper monkey brought me the paper, breakfast, and my remote. It's so nice not to have to rely on other people for help.
by JawaAvenger December 05, 2003
A person in your living area or workplace who, due to either having constant contact with children or a weak immune system, always seems to be sick with the cold or flu. Named so after the movie entitled "Outbreak" starring Oscar-winner Dustin Hoffman whereby a Capuchin monkey carries a fatal disease that he passes on to a human, endangering all of humanity in the process.
Usually, an outbreak monkey is someone who works with and/or has their own young children ( esp. a teacher and/or mom. A mom who works as a teacher could be considered a "double" oubreak monkey).
An outbreak monkey can also be a young person who would otherwise be healthy but refuses to rest/stop partying, thereby weakening their own immune system and causing them to catch and bring back any cold/flu circulating that season. College dorms are famous for housing multiple outbreak monkeys at one time.
It has also been argued that young children could be considered outbreak monkeys in their own right but this is subject to ongoing debate.
Another common feature of anoutbreak monkey is that they are "used" to being sick often and therefore do not take the necessary precautions to ensure that others do not become sick. To an outbreak monkey sickness is a way of life. They are sick so often that staying home from school/work every time they were sick would cause them to get fired/fail. As such, they often come to school/work in various stages of illness only to infect others, thereby living up to the true title of "Outbreak Monkey".
Usually, an outbreak monkey is someone who works with and/or has their own young children ( esp. a teacher and/or mom. A mom who works as a teacher could be considered a "double" oubreak monkey).
An outbreak monkey can also be a young person who would otherwise be healthy but refuses to rest/stop partying, thereby weakening their own immune system and causing them to catch and bring back any cold/flu circulating that season. College dorms are famous for housing multiple outbreak monkeys at one time.
It has also been argued that young children could be considered outbreak monkeys in their own right but this is subject to ongoing debate.
Another common feature of anoutbreak monkey is that they are "used" to being sick often and therefore do not take the necessary precautions to ensure that others do not become sick. To an outbreak monkey sickness is a way of life. They are sick so often that staying home from school/work every time they were sick would cause them to get fired/fail. As such, they often come to school/work in various stages of illness only to infect others, thereby living up to the true title of "Outbreak Monkey".
I can't believe Michelle showed up to the Christmas party with the flu. She is such an outbreak monkey. Now we are all going to get sick.
F*cking outbreak monkey, Eddie, got us all sick again before finals week.
F*cking outbreak monkey, Eddie, got us all sick again before finals week.
by alicia s. April 26, 2008
noun: the object of a chubby chaser's affection. Never refer to another person as a "chunky monkey" unless-
A. you know the person very well, so much so that said person would not be offended by being called one, or-
B. you can run very fast and will never see the person again.
A. you know the person very well, so much so that said person would not be offended by being called one, or-
B. you can run very fast and will never see the person again.
A. come on over later, my little chunky monkey!
B. baby, you are a chunky monkey. leave some food for the rest of the world!
B. baby, you are a chunky monkey. leave some food for the rest of the world!
by earpuller September 22, 2005
by Borthers February 20, 2007