Pork basting

v. The act of blowing a load all over the face of a 250+ pound girl after she gives you really good oral sex (and she will because she has to).

I had to thank that heffer for the amazing BJ so I gave her an ultimate pork basting! I think I glued her eyes shut.

by chuckerman May 2, 2005

Smug Bastard

Someone who always has an answer for everything and then puts on a 'told you so' face after proving their point in nearly all situations.

Husband "Can we move the boiler up to the loft so we can start renovations downstairs?"
Wife "No!"
Husband "My workmate Myles did it and said its the best way to do things"
Wife "Bet that Smug Bastard has a huge loft to walk around too!"

by Alfredo666 November 23, 2017

Lucky Bastard

1: A definition for someone that is getting something that other guys consider lucky and want

Sorry for short definition, ^^

Girl1: Oh my cat just got on my lap!
Guy1: Lucky Bastard

by Who what where and why? September 9, 2022

sons of bastards

A group of human males that can be identified with a common set of circumstances such as the experiences of been abandoned, abused, betrayed by the fathers or simply never had a father or a responsible father.

Dude1: “ … how about the kind of bastards that left the children to be raised by their women alone, ditching all responsibilities to the family and obsessed with gambling all fortunes away with the endless futile stupidest business ambitions; then when they see the sons may have a better shot to succeed, they just have to do everything in their bastard nature to ruin every chances their shit lucked sons may have …”

Dude2: “ … I don’t know.. never had a father anyway, that bastard left us for dead since …”

Dude1: “ … yah we’re all sons of bastards dude …”

by sonobasta February 12, 2010

You Delicious Bastard

A colloquial term for a cigarette. Often used affectionately by addicted smokers.

"Cigarettes have finally killed me. Like they killed my father, my father's father, my mother's father, my mother and her father. I just can't seem to give the damn things up. I love them! Sweet...smoky...cigarettes.

*sigh* You Delicious Bastard!"

by deathmetalfan July 12, 2010

park a bastard

Used to describe the act of defecation.

I’ll be right back, just need to park a bastard.

by Ashurimitsu June 24, 2021

Ol' Dirty Bastard

only the greatest person to ever live

you all remember his hits "shimmy shimmy ya" & "brooklyn zoo"

by nick January 6, 2005