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steroid monkey 

A common lamen who takes roids to increase his puny muscle mass while shrinking his manhood thus creating the ultimate douchebag regret with small man syndrome. Typically where's sunglasses at night and inside clubs, wife-beaters or shiny bedazzled shirts to show off his roid muscles and to intimidate others. Except he is just over 5' tall and is always looked down upon at which time he spits on people and runs away screaming like a little bitch. Once in the safety of his Benz with chrome rims and blacked out windows he believes is he now invisible to those around him and safe.

Doubebags are never safe, they stick out like a fat kid eating McDicks inside a McDicks. Joseph D'Antonio may have this experience while he worked at McDicks flipping burgers until his muscles grew and he was too good for burger flipping in his mind. He then got a nice Pit Bull and random tattoos all over his body to compliment his new roid muscle and turned into a full fledge Douchebag of Vancouver. He's currently applying to be on the Douchebags of Vancouver TV show which will air as soon as they can find enough Douchebags who can actually spell and sign their name.
Steroid Monkeys like Douchebag, Joseph D'Antonio local Vancouver Celebrity in the car scene who recently attacked and spit on a fellow car enthusiast because he had roid rage over a parking spot at a grocery store. He then ran away like a bitch, but came back to key the victims vehicle and then ran away like a little bitch a second time.
steroid monkey by Douchebag Hunter December 20, 2013
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skuz monkey 

A skuz monkey can be defined as a mischievous monkey that steals from other monkeys and people in order to better serve himself. He frequently participates in ritualistic dancing and these rituals is thought to be the reason behind this monkeys elusive demeanor. When the skuz monkey feels threatened it is also not unheard of for them to use fire as a line of defense.
A Brief history of the Fall of Marvao

Jason and Peter were farmers, bringing in the harvest from another successful year when all of a sudden they found themselves in unfamiliar territories.

"Jason! Watch the food cart it is said that this is skuz monkey territory! "
*Cries from the distance -- Oh - WAH WAH WAH*
"Oh God Jason -- there every where .. get the guns -- GET THE GUNS!"
"WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH"
* Cries getting closer and the ritualistic dance ensues *
"I SEE THE BASTARD - SHOOT SHOOT"
" ITS NO USE PETER -- BACK TO THE VILLAGE, BACK TO THE VILLAGE!"

As Jason and Peter tried to take down the Skuz Monkeys their attempts ended up to be futile and ended up running back to the village for back up and support. The skuz monkeys followed the men all the way back to the village and wielded sharp branches and stones as ammo for their attack . As the monkeys proceeded into the city they took it over with nearly no resistance -- they than continued to danced to the middle of the city where they began to throw all of there sticks into a pile and set it on fire. They then performed a ritualistic dance as the great fire started to intensify.

As the fire engulfed all major huts and crops -- the monkeys continued on there torment path as they proceeded to rape and pillage the rest of their village until it was destroyed. Rumor has it that those skuz monkeys also danced until every last woman and children were raped and every hut or property was destroyed.

Allah Monkey 

Allah Monkey is an idolized monkey that if someone were to swear by it, they would be telling the full truth.
George: Bro, did you actually fuck a dude?
Bhullar: On Allah Monkey I did!
Allah Monkey by Lt. Gyako May 10, 2021

wet the monkey 

To perform a sexual act involving male genitalia that are moistened by any substance, especially by, ahem, natural lubrication.
I haven't wet the monkey in FOREVER. I'm seriously pining.

Dude, you wet the monkey when you're by yourself? That takes a lot of effort. I normally keep it dry.
wet the monkey by Garr Fizlock March 4, 2009

Purple Pirate Ninja Monkey 

It is said that the Purple Pirate Ninja Monkey is the only thing in existence that can survive a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris. This creature dwells in the deepest areas of the amazon rainforest feasting on various fruits and plants. Standing 12 feet tall and armed with an arsenal of pirate weapons and ninja skills it is quite simply the most deadly animal on the planet.

*WARNING*

Stay away, extremely dangerous DO NOT APPROACH under any circumstances
None available, nobody has ever been near the Purple Pirate Ninja Monkey and survived.

Purple Pirate Ninja Monkey Death Sword Shuriken Amazon Chuck Norris Chuck Norris

Alaskan Spider Monkey 

The act of filling a vagina with ice and then having sex with it.
Stan had a very cold dick after doing an alaskan spider monkey.
Alaskan Spider Monkey by jps123456 November 15, 2011

Rug Monkey 

term for children, specifically one that's just been born.
Man my aunt just squirted out another rug monkey.
Rug Monkey by thedeciver January 11, 2009