squat cobbler

The erotic act of a male squatting to dip his genitalia into a freshly baked pie or cobbler.

Clay: "Damn, my balls are sticky and covered in blueberries this morning."
Billy: "Yeah, you got toasted and ended up being a fucking squat cobbler last night."

by TheMaDsQuatter August 30, 2016

squat cobbler

When a fully clothed man in a costume sits on a pie and wiggles around in it

Dan: What kind of pie do squat cobblers use?
Jimmy: I don't know. Peach, banana cream, not really my area of expertise.

by PatrickMcElephant August 30, 2016

squat cobbler

When a person, fully clothed mind you, sits on a pie and wiggles their ass around in it.

Dan's tears salted the lightly toasted meringue as he prepared to lower his buttocks for his first squat cobbler.

by toiletjocky August 30, 2016

squat cobbler

A man who sits in a pie and wiggles around for sexual arousal.

"I bet that Randy is a Squat Cobbler "

by Whoretism August 29, 2016

Squat cobbler

Video wherein a person sits in a pie for the purpose of titillating the viewer.

Not a porn.

May require a costume and/or crying.

Origin: Better Call Saul, episode Pardon My Clutch.

The squat cobbler videos were hidden in the baseboards.

by Metroslo August 29, 2016

Hoboken Squat Cobbler

Someone who takes videos of himself squatting naked on a pie, preferably of the cream type variety, and masturbating much to the delight of his intended viewer.

He's in the other room making a video with a pie. He's a Hoboken Squat Cobbler.

by Yankwood August 29, 2016

Squat Cobbler

When a man/woman sits on a pie and wiggles their buttox for the enjoyment of others.

Lacie really enjoys when Matt performs his signature squat cobbler. Her favorite involves a cream pie

by skater271 August 29, 2016