A townie is a the label for a group of people who shit on the english language, wear crappy ripoff adidas clothes, have an I.Q. lower than than my nan's tits, and are as ugly as a hatfull of ass.
Other word/s for townie: scum.
Other word/s for townie: scum.
by Someone who's better than you. I rule. November 2, 2004
Get the townie mug.The townie (tracksuits retardus) are hideous creatures which roam the lands of England. They tend to be known as chavs, neds or basically just fucking assholes.
The male of the species tend to be called 'Gav', 'Gaz', 'Baz', 'Nat' or 'Matty'. He tends to have a shaved head, to make him look 'rock 'ard, innit', or in modern English, tough. Although townies are racist towards asians, they accept black people into their 'crew', and the black townies tend to bleach their hair yellow (blonde). Their hides tend to consist of (fake) Burberry caps, hoodies over the top, with the hood constantly up, matching tracksuit bottoms with the lines down the side, and white trainers. They also tend to wear plastic rings from the 20 pence (British money) plastic jewelry vending machines. They buy all their 'bling' or 'heavy shit' with money stolen from their parents or 5-year-olds which they beat up, money found on the floor, or from drug dealing and their girlfriends' prostitution, which brings me onto the female of the species.
Female townies tend to be named after dolls, or celebrities such as 'Britney' or 'Jordan' (Americans, Jordan is a page 3 model famous for her massive big tits). There are two types of female townie. There is the Stripy Pink Townie and the Half Naked Townie. The stripy pink townie wears a white tracksuit top with 'Babe' on the front in bright pink text with pink stripes down the sleeves, and cheapest of the cheap matching white jogging bottoms with pink stripes down them, all of this of course, with the cheap white trainers. The half naked townie wears very little. She wears a 2-inch long skirt, knee-high boots and tight bra-tops. They are sluts, and are usually prostitutes. The two types of female have alot of things in common, however. They both wear hoop-earings with a diameter of 2 meters, they both wear cheap makeup and perfume which smells of fresh assjuice, they are all blonde with huge dark roots, even the natural blonde townies have 9-inch roots.
All townies travel in groups of 50 to about 80. They beat up anything which moves, however they don't fight alone, for instance it will take them all to beat up a couple of 7-year-olds and steal their money. There are usually under-10s in the group of townies, usually the sons and daughters of the 11-year-old townies. The offspring will usually see you coming, run back to the group of townies and tell them that you were picking on them, quite basically, they are all little shits. As the big townies start shouting abuse at you, the little townies will usually finish their fathers' sentences with "yeah!", "go on, Gav, beat the shit out of the fucker" or "yer fuckin' dead ya knob 'ed". All townies smoke. It's not an option. The strange creatures seem to live on nicotine rather than oxygen, scientists still want to investigate this, but they can't get too close to capture a townie without getting spat at or beat up. If you hear "WHAT YOU WALKIN' AWAY FOR?", "WHAT YOU FUCKIN' LOOKIN' AT?" or "DON'T YOU FUCKIN' IGNORE ME!", it is a good chance that within 30 seconds, you will be chased by a bunch of 50 or so male townies on bikes which they got for Christmas when they were 5 years old, spitting and swearing. Townies never actually beat anyone up, but they spit and throw things so be warned.
The male of the species tend to be called 'Gav', 'Gaz', 'Baz', 'Nat' or 'Matty'. He tends to have a shaved head, to make him look 'rock 'ard, innit', or in modern English, tough. Although townies are racist towards asians, they accept black people into their 'crew', and the black townies tend to bleach their hair yellow (blonde). Their hides tend to consist of (fake) Burberry caps, hoodies over the top, with the hood constantly up, matching tracksuit bottoms with the lines down the side, and white trainers. They also tend to wear plastic rings from the 20 pence (British money) plastic jewelry vending machines. They buy all their 'bling' or 'heavy shit' with money stolen from their parents or 5-year-olds which they beat up, money found on the floor, or from drug dealing and their girlfriends' prostitution, which brings me onto the female of the species.
Female townies tend to be named after dolls, or celebrities such as 'Britney' or 'Jordan' (Americans, Jordan is a page 3 model famous for her massive big tits). There are two types of female townie. There is the Stripy Pink Townie and the Half Naked Townie. The stripy pink townie wears a white tracksuit top with 'Babe' on the front in bright pink text with pink stripes down the sleeves, and cheapest of the cheap matching white jogging bottoms with pink stripes down them, all of this of course, with the cheap white trainers. The half naked townie wears very little. She wears a 2-inch long skirt, knee-high boots and tight bra-tops. They are sluts, and are usually prostitutes. The two types of female have alot of things in common, however. They both wear hoop-earings with a diameter of 2 meters, they both wear cheap makeup and perfume which smells of fresh assjuice, they are all blonde with huge dark roots, even the natural blonde townies have 9-inch roots.
All townies travel in groups of 50 to about 80. They beat up anything which moves, however they don't fight alone, for instance it will take them all to beat up a couple of 7-year-olds and steal their money. There are usually under-10s in the group of townies, usually the sons and daughters of the 11-year-old townies. The offspring will usually see you coming, run back to the group of townies and tell them that you were picking on them, quite basically, they are all little shits. As the big townies start shouting abuse at you, the little townies will usually finish their fathers' sentences with "yeah!", "go on, Gav, beat the shit out of the fucker" or "yer fuckin' dead ya knob 'ed". All townies smoke. It's not an option. The strange creatures seem to live on nicotine rather than oxygen, scientists still want to investigate this, but they can't get too close to capture a townie without getting spat at or beat up. If you hear "WHAT YOU WALKIN' AWAY FOR?", "WHAT YOU FUCKIN' LOOKIN' AT?" or "DON'T YOU FUCKIN' IGNORE ME!", it is a good chance that within 30 seconds, you will be chased by a bunch of 50 or so male townies on bikes which they got for Christmas when they were 5 years old, spitting and swearing. Townies never actually beat anyone up, but they spit and throw things so be warned.
"Oreet Gav ma bruv, innit!"
"Oreet Matty!"
"I dealt some of ma shit today to dese mothafuckas and i used tha dough to buy dis fuckin gold ring!"
"Whoa, that shit's heavy, bruv!"
"Yeah look, the gold fuckin rubs off in case ya want it to be silver!"
"That's fuckin heavy shit bruv!"
"Innit?"
"Oreet Matty!"
"I dealt some of ma shit today to dese mothafuckas and i used tha dough to buy dis fuckin gold ring!"
"Whoa, that shit's heavy, bruv!"
"Yeah look, the gold fuckin rubs off in case ya want it to be silver!"
"That's fuckin heavy shit bruv!"
"Innit?"
by Arran December 4, 2004
Get the Townie mug.Apparently has a very different meaning in the UK, but in good old aussie slang means a person from a rural area that lives in a small town (as opposed to on a farm)
(upon meeting someone in a major city)
Person 1: so where are you from
Person 2: oh, i'm from the country
Person 1: so your a farmboy?
Person 2: no, a townie
Person 1: so where are you from
Person 2: oh, i'm from the country
Person 1: so your a farmboy?
Person 2: no, a townie
by Turbosloth August 14, 2006
Get the townie mug.Someone who is going no where in life. Someone who grows up in a certain town (Foxboro for Example) and does not leave this town after highschool. A towny does not go to a real college and gets trashed every night. This is the type of person that most likly in the future will beat their townie wives, and have kids that also become townies
Scene: ten year High school reunion
"Wow Tyler, whatchya doin now?"asks Jon
"Well i still live at home" Tyler Replys
"Did you go to school?"
"No."
"Got a wife or kids?" Jon Asks
"Yah, im married to Katie"
"Oh god you are one big Townie family huh?"
"Wow Tyler, whatchya doin now?"asks Jon
"Well i still live at home" Tyler Replys
"Did you go to school?"
"No."
"Got a wife or kids?" Jon Asks
"Yah, im married to Katie"
"Oh god you are one big Townie family huh?"
by unknown January 18, 2004
Get the townie mug.A townie is an English word for a person who:
1. Uses the phrase "Ya Mum" as an insult
2. Thinks that it is cool/hard to use various words beginning with F and S
3. Listens to "Phat Beats" - Blazin Squad, So Solid Crew, Jay-Z (or whatever) etc.
4. Drives a Car such as a Vauxhall Nova or Ford Escort or similar which has A body kit, lowerred suspension, large exhaust, and a huge Subwoofer in the boot to make sure that everyone can hear their "Phat Beats"
5. Has a stupid nickname such as "Jubba" or "Staples"
6. Steals mobile phones
7. Wears "Bling Threads"
8. Walks in a stupid, exaggerated way
9. Has a fundamental disability to pronounce the letter "H"
10. Smokes all the time whilst doing the above
11. Is challenged by a lack of immagination
12. Has a Helly Hansen "Puffer Jacket"
13. Has gelled blonde (dyed) hair
1. Uses the phrase "Ya Mum" as an insult
2. Thinks that it is cool/hard to use various words beginning with F and S
3. Listens to "Phat Beats" - Blazin Squad, So Solid Crew, Jay-Z (or whatever) etc.
4. Drives a Car such as a Vauxhall Nova or Ford Escort or similar which has A body kit, lowerred suspension, large exhaust, and a huge Subwoofer in the boot to make sure that everyone can hear their "Phat Beats"
5. Has a stupid nickname such as "Jubba" or "Staples"
6. Steals mobile phones
7. Wears "Bling Threads"
8. Walks in a stupid, exaggerated way
9. Has a fundamental disability to pronounce the letter "H"
10. Smokes all the time whilst doing the above
11. Is challenged by a lack of immagination
12. Has a Helly Hansen "Puffer Jacket"
13. Has gelled blonde (dyed) hair
by Tommo August 4, 2003
Get the townie mug.Someone who stands in corners waiting to "start summat" with anyone who walks by. Townies usually walk around in "crews" varying from 7 to 20 people. Some common characteristics: Female Townie
Lots of "bling bling"
Pink tracksuit
Random Burberry hairband
Hair tied at the side
Really bad attitude problem
Fag in her hand
A bag that can just about fit a £2 coin in
Hair gelled back really tight
So much make up - orange foundation with a line around the edge of the face
Male Townie
Lots of "bling bling"
Blue Tracksuit
Massive rings on every finger
Really bad attitude problem
Fag in his hand
Over gelled hair
HUGE "diamond" earring to show how "manly" he is
Phrases:
"what da fuk do you think you're staring at?"
"are you starting beef wiv me?"
*cough* ""dirty" gof"
*cough* ""dirty" grunga"
"it's not halloween" *townie "crew" all laugh hysterically*
"i'm gonna bang you up innit?"
"don't get moufy/ loud/ lairy wiv me"
"your mum's fat"
"your mum's a slag"
"i fucked your mum last night"
"yo yo bruv!"
"oi blud!"
"omg did you just see that buff boy/ girl?"
" i had sex with 6 people last night" (and they still think their not whores....)
Townies seem to think that shouting at people makes them look "ard", but when you answer back they all run and tell their brothers/ sisters to "bang you up". The most pathetic thing about them is that they think that their "insults" will upset you. Take "it's not halloween" for instance. They seem to think that this will really bother you. And they also think it's funny. But it doesn't bother people. And it's not funny. I think that they should all sit down and try to come up with something more insulting. But then again, what comes out of their heads is completely useless shit and they're not that intelligent. Swearing is part of their limited vocabulary. "Fuk dis" and "fuck dat". If you ever get into a situation where a townie starts shouting at you, even whilst following you, try not to answer back too much, they'll be about 10 more of them around the corner awaiting calls for backup and about 6 more up the road stealing phones or whatever. Townies should die. Then the world would be a better place. Remember this: if in doubt, kill a townie.
Lots of "bling bling"
Pink tracksuit
Random Burberry hairband
Hair tied at the side
Really bad attitude problem
Fag in her hand
A bag that can just about fit a £2 coin in
Hair gelled back really tight
So much make up - orange foundation with a line around the edge of the face
Male Townie
Lots of "bling bling"
Blue Tracksuit
Massive rings on every finger
Really bad attitude problem
Fag in his hand
Over gelled hair
HUGE "diamond" earring to show how "manly" he is
Phrases:
"what da fuk do you think you're staring at?"
"are you starting beef wiv me?"
*cough* ""dirty" gof"
*cough* ""dirty" grunga"
"it's not halloween" *townie "crew" all laugh hysterically*
"i'm gonna bang you up innit?"
"don't get moufy/ loud/ lairy wiv me"
"your mum's fat"
"your mum's a slag"
"i fucked your mum last night"
"yo yo bruv!"
"oi blud!"
"omg did you just see that buff boy/ girl?"
" i had sex with 6 people last night" (and they still think their not whores....)
Townies seem to think that shouting at people makes them look "ard", but when you answer back they all run and tell their brothers/ sisters to "bang you up". The most pathetic thing about them is that they think that their "insults" will upset you. Take "it's not halloween" for instance. They seem to think that this will really bother you. And they also think it's funny. But it doesn't bother people. And it's not funny. I think that they should all sit down and try to come up with something more insulting. But then again, what comes out of their heads is completely useless shit and they're not that intelligent. Swearing is part of their limited vocabulary. "Fuk dis" and "fuck dat". If you ever get into a situation where a townie starts shouting at you, even whilst following you, try not to answer back too much, they'll be about 10 more of them around the corner awaiting calls for backup and about 6 more up the road stealing phones or whatever. Townies should die. Then the world would be a better place. Remember this: if in doubt, kill a townie.
by Kerry March 6, 2005
Get the townie mug.A person with a lack of ability to talk. using words like innit, nah m8 and geeza
they have changed the good old meaning of RnB or Hip Hop to a crap pop sham, with sluts who cant sing and huuge groups of boys who think its hard to tightly squeeze their crotch (though it doesnt hurt as theres nothing there).
Wearing tracksuits, burburry (fake)
Been smoking since they first heard the word ciggarette.
Girls wearing, incredibly short skirts, not even a skirt, more a belt, gelled back hair, with badly blonde highlights.
They add 'innit' in every possible space of a sentance.
They hate anyone more attractive, intellegent, niceer, better than them.
and therefore owe them a good beating.
Their arch enemy: Anyone with their own opinion. Alternative people
they have changed the good old meaning of RnB or Hip Hop to a crap pop sham, with sluts who cant sing and huuge groups of boys who think its hard to tightly squeeze their crotch (though it doesnt hurt as theres nothing there).
Wearing tracksuits, burburry (fake)
Been smoking since they first heard the word ciggarette.
Girls wearing, incredibly short skirts, not even a skirt, more a belt, gelled back hair, with badly blonde highlights.
They add 'innit' in every possible space of a sentance.
They hate anyone more attractive, intellegent, niceer, better than them.
and therefore owe them a good beating.
Their arch enemy: Anyone with their own opinion. Alternative people
Townie: ah bruv, iz u startin m8, coz i 'as a big bruva dat killed like 10 ppl last wk, n like neva got caught. innit
Someone: I'm sorry, i didnt quite get that, what did you just say?
Townie: u iz a batty
Someone: sorry, what?
Someone: I'm sorry, i didnt quite get that, what did you just say?
Townie: u iz a batty
Someone: sorry, what?
by Ella January 28, 2004
Get the townie mug.