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Zombie Jesus Day

Easter... when Jesus rose from the dead... and we all know what a person is when he rises from the dead...

Taken from Cyanide and Happiness comics on April 8, 2007.
by RhapsodyEternal April 24, 2007
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Jesus Murphy

Canadian Jesus Christ. Meant to be said as an expletive.
What time is it? Jesus Murphy, I’m late!

Sue screams Jesus Murphy after she see’s a spider. She’s a total arachnophobe.

I like saying Jesus Murphy instead of using the lords name in vain.
by Kaizo64 September 1, 2018
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Jesus Driver

A person who drives like a asshole, with a religious radio station sticker or logo on the car.
by vwsurf August 15, 2009
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Sweet Zombie Jesus

An expletive denoting great shock and consternation.

It was used by Professor Farnsworth from tv's "Futurama."
"Five dollars for the secret antidote?! Sweet Zombie Jesus! This is highway robbery!"
by J.F.K. October 31, 2003
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Raptor Jesus

Raptor Jesus appeared before me, and he said: "Take heed my son, for there shall be many who doubt me, but whosoever believeth in me shall have everlasting life." I wept with joy at the gift bestowed, "Yet, my lord, what fate shall be given to the unworthy?" He answered: "Their entrails shall be rent from their stomachs, their limbs ripped from their torso, to feast our hungry bodies, and restore our souls. Whensoever you feast upon the heart of thine enemy, think of me." For that is the beauty of Raptor Jesus.
One day, Raptor Jesus walked a busy street with his disciple, Anonymous. Anonymous and his like-named brethren populated the land on which they strolled, as common as blades of grass. They walked, discussing many things, but, Anonymous paused for a moment. “Lord?” he spoke, “Is not this idle talk frowned upon by your father?” And quoth Raptor Jesus; “All voice communicates knowledge. Knowledge is hardly frowned upon by anyone, and thus your ‘idle talk’ does not exist, unless you speak of memes. Memes are idle, as they are merely communication of things all know of” And thus our Lord beckoned to a painting of an insanely smiling man. “However, memes can bring laughter and happiness, thus, one can surmise that He enjoys them, and hardly frowns upon them” And Anonymous looked ahead, silent.
by Anon Divad January 2, 2008
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East Jesus

damn, the parking lot was full and I had to park in East Jesus
by d5 and d3 April 11, 2000
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Jebus

Homer Simpson's version of God.
"I can't be a missionary! I don't even believe in Jebus!"
by Lindsay December 8, 2003
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