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felons and retards in blue

(n.) A derogatory reference to bandwagon fans of the L.A. Dodgers or Dallas Cowboys. Most particularly those hopeless souls that are fans of BOTH the Dodgers & Cowboys that do not (nor have they ever) live(d) in the home region of either team, yet make up for their lack of geographical closeness by excessively annoying those fans of local teams by proclaiming their team(s) are #1 in spite of a lack of credulity to their claims.

Most are know criminals (felons) and/or clinically diagnosed mentally ill (retards) that live outside the L.A. or Dallas areas and are misguided hangers-on to past decades when those teams may have had a modicum of talent and/or luck. Their illogical & persistent affiliation with the team is most directly attributed a missing chromosome that also appears to result in excessive body tattooing, domestic violence, binge drinking, bed-wetting, drooling and an unexplained need to wear over-sized and excessively dark sunglasses (maybe out of embarrassment).

Both groups are made up of delinquents, reprobates, malcontents, and blow-hards that are the scourge of all true sports fans. Extreme cases are evidenced by a trip to their "mecca" (stadium) to demonstrate their loyalty & obtain a pathetic photo of them wearing a blue team jersey while holding up one finger that they can later post as a testament to their senseless dedication.
Daughter: Daddy, what's a synonym for loser?

Father: There are lots of them honey, but the one that best describes would be the felons and retards in blue or bluetards.

Daughter: Do you mean the Dodger fans or the Cowboy fans?

Father: Yes.

Sometimes abbreviated FARIB
Also see fucktards or bluetards
by Mark in San Bruno February 11, 2010
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fashion felony

To dress in gawdy clothing or to wear something out of style in public.
Earl commits a fashion felony everytime he wears that gawd awful leisure suit in public.
by TIMJB1 September 20, 2006
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Related Words

felony stupid

term originally used by members of the legal profession to describe clients or members of the general public who make statements that are totally illogical or impossible to defend
Everyone in class was thinking the teacher was felony stupid when it took him 30 minutes to explain why he was 10 minutes late.
by dp9 October 12, 2003
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gellin like a felon

To relax comfortably with Dr.Scholls gel shoe inserts.
Similar to "chillin'like a villain."
I'm gellin' like a felon, eating some melon, feeling up helen and my member is swellin'
by Mighty Whitey August 22, 2003
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feces felon

A derogatory yet public appropriate name for a gay dude
God, Bob is such a feces felon!
by Joe Brannen September 23, 2005
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felonious

"Felony" like. Up to no good.
Any activity you could probably catch a felony by participating in.
1."What's that guy doing behind that building?"

"I don't know, but it looks pretty FELONIOUS."

2."She's the biggest troublemaker I know, totally FELONIOUS."
by Bonnie Kate March 11, 2010
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Felony Flats

A broad term used by PDX locals to describe SE Portland neigborhoods.
Yeah, I just moved into the flats, or Its dirt cheap living in felony flats.
by shannon2323 March 15, 2009
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