Wesley Durrance's definitions

Uranus

A planet that lends itself very well to really, really stupid jokes.

Jim: Hey Tom, look through this telescope.
Tom: What? What am I looking at now.
Jim: Well, I just saw URANUS in the sky! Ha-HA!

by Wesley Durrance January 2, 2006

wise-acre

Wise-acre is essentially synonymous with the terms jerk and jackass. One defining feature is that a wise-acre enjoys comedy more than anything, and therefore an insult comic or a practical joker would be called wise-acres. It has fallen into disuse recently, but it's still there.

Yeah, Tom's a real wise-acre. He screwed the top of the salt-lid off and when I went to pour it it fell off.

by Wesley Durrance October 19, 2005

Sporange

A sniglet invented for the sole purpose of rhyming with orange. It means those useless bits of white rind left over after you have peeled an orange.

After peeling an orange, one will usually find some sporange. Door hinge...

by Wesley Durrance October 9, 2005

psychic vampire

A made up mythical creature just like Centaurs and Leprechauns. Probably stemming from modern-day culture's obsession with vampires.

Tony: Oh Jesus! A psychic vampire!
Renold: Oh sure, and I'm sure there's a fucking shoe goblin right behind me as well.

by Wesley Durrance October 9, 2005

tis

A word that is rarely used outside of the Drama Club circles in high schools.

Sam: My, 'tis a beautiful day.
Karl: God, what fag.

by Wesley Durrance September 23, 2005

Thou

Bible-speak for you. It can be used in a Biblical Curse.

Thou art doomed, for thine own spawn shalt be born of hellfire, forthwith!

by Wesley Durrance September 23, 2005

forthwith

Something you shout out after saying something to emphasize it. Usually meant to be funny.

Fred: Hand me the nachos Steve.
Steve: You get 'em, they're like two feet away from you.
Fred: FORTHWITH!

by Wesley Durrance September 23, 2005