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Telephony's definitions

spanken

How some people misspell the word, "spanking".
I don't know about you but I'd rather be giving the dog a spanken than having to scrub this nasty-ass toilet with a toothbrush because I thew away the orange juice that mom put in my lunchpail!
by Telephony July 24, 2019
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popcycle

Popcycle (pronounced, "/ˈpɑpsɪk(ə)l/")
A surprisingly common misspelling of the word, "Popcicle®", an ice pop on a flat wooden stick manufactured by the Unilever Group of Companies.
Normally only seen in written, typed, or printed material because popcycle is pronounced the same as Popsicle®.
{from an SMS message}: Honey, please swing by the store on your way home and get me a popcycle or two
by Telephony July 31, 2019
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butter

butter (buh·tr) v. To shoplift a low-value item such as one or more candy bars, disposable pens, or a boxed set of battery-powered Christmas lights.
{Ricky}: Hey Craig, can you go butter me a couple of Snicker bars and a 3-Muskerteers bar at the Rexall during lunch break?
{Craig}: Sure thing Ricky!
{Craig returns a short while with the stolen articles}: Here ya go Ricky. They were out of 3-Muskerteers so I buttered a couple of packs of M&Ms instead.
by Telephony November 5, 2019
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A nicer way of saying the phrase, "PISS OFF, PISS ANT"; basically telling somebody to go fuck themselves.
Piddle is another word for piss, and wingless hymenoptera is another way to say ant -- in particular, a female ant because males of many species do indeed have wings.

Works better when written or typed rather than when spoken.

The all-caps presentation is intentional; you want the recipient to think that you're shouting.
{Excerpt from an SMS message}

David}: Craig, can you clean out the plastic cat toliet while I'm gone?
{Craig}: PIDDLE OPPOSITE OF "ON", PIDDLE WINGLESS HYMENOPTERA!!! :-/
by Telephony April 6, 2019
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Twenty Twisted-Stick-Tire

How the year 2020 might appear when viewed from above.
{From a daily update to a BBS about wheelchairs & scooters}:
01-07-20 {or "2020 07 Jan.", or even "January 07, Twenty Twisted-Stick-Tire" if you prefer}.
Just making my daily check-in from Tok AK. USA...my people (who live in Nicaragua) we have but one bunghole...er...uh...I mean I only have a sodding Cingular update planned for my website today...it concerns my having added an aerial video of flights of my DJI Phantom 3 standard FPV Drone to my website.
by Telephony December 9, 2019
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whirling down the shitbowl

Going to pot, going to hell in a handbasket; a way of saying that a situation or a person's condition is deteriorating extremely rapidly.
Mom's mind is whirling down the shitbowl; she always forgets to take her meds, she lies in bed naked all day, she has poopinary and pissinary incontinence, she won't even get up to get a glass of water.
by Telephony May 4, 2019
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squeaky

{Jerry, watching the Maury show on the telly}: Aww look at Marisol. She still hasn't found the baby daddy. She's so squeaky!!!
by Telephony May 6, 2019
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