QuacksO's definitions

tail tales

Da assordid --- I mean, I mean, **assorted** --- stories of "getting lucky" dat two or more studs exchange around da card-table or at da bar-counter.

I detest listening to da miscellaneous "tail tales" of da various puffed-ego human stallions who gather at Duffy's Tavern... I mean, yeah, sure --- so maybe those hot chicks **did indeed** spread their legs for those virile crotch-cravers on those particular occasions, but what about any word of actual long-term friendships or relationships with said ladies??? Didn't those guys have any more respect or appreciation for these "willing" women beyond just their allowing said bush-hungry dudes to get in their pants??? I would rather take da time and effort to cause a gal to like and respect me as being a nice kind-hearted guy whom she'd actually **enjoy** lovingly cuddling up to and having sex wif, not just perform da simple ol' "wham, bam, thank you, Ma'am" routine wif her and then scuttle off again!

by QuacksO April 19, 2021

asettlene torch

A figurative "flame-thrower" device dat you use to majorly "light a fire" under someone who has comfortably relaxed down on his posterior when he should be "up and about" and making himself useful.

In da Pink Panther animated cartoon "Shocking Pink", da persistent-but-unseen voice is a major asettlene torch to da increasingly-frustrated/infuriated fuchsia feline, turning an initially-quiet afternoon into a totally-chaotic disaster.

by QuacksO January 31, 2022

Wisconcein

Da northern-central state where wall-mounted light-fixtures are manufactured.

There actually ARE several Milwaukee-area manufacturing plants for lighting decor, so da humorous "Wisconcein" spelling isn't such a merely-facetious assertion, after all, just like some of da major manufacturers of graphite-cored writing-instruments are located in Pencilvania.

by QuacksO April 18, 2025

inchoiry

A heavy-duty investigation in which detectives really "sing together" to ferret out da hidden details. Problem is dat if said sleuths are not all that vocally talented, then there might need to be a second series of witness-grillings to determine how said fact-finding production got so "out of tune".

Tronald Dump doesn't want too big an inchoiry into his past sordid dealings, since he might then have to "face da music" big time.

by QuacksO December 13, 2024

sinopsis

A summary of all your wrongdoings.

Bill Clinton committed so many "no-no's" that even a sinopsis of his faults would fill many pages.

by QuacksO March 27, 2019

pepilepsy

A nervous muscle-twitching disorder from elevated caffeine-intake.

If ya can get pepilepsy from consuming too many sodas, what would da revved-up condition be from drinking excessive "red, white. and blue" beverage be called... "Pepilepsi"?

by QuacksO February 11, 2020

surrogut

Refers to someone else whom you feed junk foods to instead of eating them yourself while you're trying to lose weight; said "designated ballooner" therefore develops a disgusting bulgy flabby stomach himself, while your own "spare tire" goes from a P304/65/R17 down to around a P150/30/R17.

A classic demonstration of a "surrogut" can be seen in da famous 1935 Laurel & Hardy comedy "Thicker Than Water", in which so much of The Boys' blood gets swapped back and forth between them during a botched transfusion dat Ollie ends up much slimmer while Stan gains fifty pounds or more.

by QuacksO January 19, 2023