QuacksO's definitions
The impromptu "time-contest" that you are forced to wage with an approaching vehicle when you step off da sidewalk to pee and there is little concealing "cover"; you therefore have to actively "hurry your bladder" in a desperate effort to "drain yer radiator" quickly enough to "beat da clock" --- i.e., to finish "whizzing" and get your pants zipped back up before the "whizzing" car gets close enough for its occupants to catch sight of you wif yer tallywacker out.
I try to always choose a thickly-vegetated spot in which to take a leak when I'm out walking along country lanes, but occasionally there is such a lengthy stretch of sparse bush-growth that I am unable to "hold it" long enough to eventually reach denser roadside-foliage; I therefore have to "hold a whiz-race" if I hear one or more vehicles approaching in the distance.
by QuacksO November 5, 2018
Get the whiz-race mug.An involuntary muscle-twitching dat a camera-shy person feels from either having to press da release-button to take a photo, or when he hears da click of da camera when a picture is being taken of him.
One simple way to mostly eliminate image-blurring from fairly-minor shutter-shudder is to use a fast exposure-speed (and a flashbulb, too, if it's fairly low-light conditions); you may need to use a suitably large lens and wide aperture-setting to accommodate said swift-click camera-snap.
by QuacksO January 8, 2020
Get the shutter-shudder mug.The White Knight totally "went Rain Man" on Alice when he huffily told her, "Oh, I've had plenty of practice --- plenty of practice!" after she expressed concern about how he kept repeatedly falling off his horse, so perhaps he (and the Red Knight, as well!) was just super-clumsy, and thus no amount of training could significantly improve his horsemanship.
by QuacksO August 22, 2019
Get the I've had plenty of practice mug.Refers to da occasional hugs, kisses, hand-claps, pats on the head/back, shoulder-scrunchies, etc. dat at a cuddly dude gives a visiting lady-friend to ensure dat she never feels ignored, lonesome, or "left out" for too long during periods while he's busying himself with "bachelor chores" like housework, vehicle-maintenance, etc.
I met a nice lady on Tagged.com who is wonderful company whenever she visits, but she has physical infirmities dat make her unable to just effortlessly tag along wif me while I go about my daily duties around da house and garage, so I always make sure to shower her wif plenty of periodic affection so dat she feels reassured dat I remember dat she's there and appreciate her spending time wif me.
by QuacksO October 10, 2019
Get the periodic affection mug.by QuacksO April 6, 2025
Get the propearly mug.Cryin' crocodile-tears in da presence of grieving fellow humans, when you're actually feelin' "fat, dumb, and happy" about whatever misfortune has occurred.
Two examples of when one might display simperthy would be if:
(1) a deceased person had either been a pain in da-a** to you and/or has left you a tidy "chunk o' change" in his will, or
(2) a romantic couple has broken up, and one of da two people was someone whom you yourself had had your eye on, and so you figger dat now dat he's no longer "taken", you may have a shot at dating him yourself.
(1) a deceased person had either been a pain in da-a** to you and/or has left you a tidy "chunk o' change" in his will, or
(2) a romantic couple has broken up, and one of da two people was someone whom you yourself had had your eye on, and so you figger dat now dat he's no longer "taken", you may have a shot at dating him yourself.
by QuacksO February 5, 2023
Get the simperthy mug.Refers to either of two incendiary-rocket-related definitions:
(1) The characteristic bruising/blistering suffered by careless/clumsy armory-workers who repeatedly drop said ordnance while wearing inadequate shoe-protection.
(2) A spherical-shaped cluster of explosives which is hung from the ceiling at a terrorists' end-of-year party; it's the only way to get these hatred-steeped warmongers to display any degree of affection.
(1) The characteristic bruising/blistering suffered by careless/clumsy armory-workers who repeatedly drop said ordnance while wearing inadequate shoe-protection.
(2) A spherical-shaped cluster of explosives which is hung from the ceiling at a terrorists' end-of-year party; it's the only way to get these hatred-steeped warmongers to display any degree of affection.
Contrary to what he told Jeff Dunham, Achmed came to look as he is today by trying to kiss one of his 46 wives underneath the missiletoe --- he'd unknowingly set the timer wrong on one of them, and the whole 0%!$@# cluster went up due to "premature detonation".
by QuacksO August 4, 2018
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