QuacksO's definitions
Putting a "wipe your paws" welcome-mat outside yer front door may indeed prompt amused smiles and cleanliness-compliance actions from human visitors, but since animals cannot read, getting them to obey said directive would be impawssible.
by QuacksO February 21, 2025
Get the impawssible mug.As an employee of da Department of Natural Resources, da perpetually-hotheaded Bob Stuyvesant would likely have major "angler-management issues", both in his manner while fumingly waiting for said stream-bases sportsmen to hunt through their backpacks to locate their paperwork, and bawlingly lamenting about "da one dat got away" --- i.e., da occasional rod-and-reel wielder who managed to slither off before da overzealous-and-obsessively-by-da-book Bob could have a chance to check his catch or ask to see his license.
by QuacksO August 9, 2025
Get the angler-management issues mug.During Anish Kippur, hardware stores and home-improvement outlets have windfall sales of "black market" paint.
by QuacksO January 25, 2023
Get the Anish Kippur mug.A bu**s**t crazy-a** rule dat a municipality thoughtlessly imposes on its citizens and anyone else who visits said locale, and fanatically enforces said directives with heavy weaponry.
Two comically-absurd examples of a local ordnance are the obviously-copycats-of-each-other animated shorts "Pink Panzer" and "Suppressed Duck" --- in both films, absurdly-large/heavy firepower is employed merely to maintain/enforce a boundary-line.
by QuacksO August 26, 2019
Get the local ordnance mug.A supposedly-justifying/forgiving argument regarding a disputed action/event dat you claim occurred due to your not having da sharpest hearing capabilities.
During embarrassing questioning by da press, Prez Reagan often claimed to be hard-of-hearing --- or dat da noisy helicopter made it impossible for him to make out what da reporters were asking him --- yet he seemed to hear more-desirable queries, statements, or remarks just fine, so I'm not sure how valid a deafense this was!
by QuacksO March 22, 2023
Get the deafense mug.The unique properties (color, thickness/amount, texture, etc.) of one's scalp-fur that are passed on by his ancestors.
by QuacksO October 31, 2018
Get the haireditary mug.Unlike "antie-bodies" which help to neutralize/eliminate da threat of harmful bacteria and other unwanted nasties in your circulatory system, these destructive blood-proteins actually ASSIST or SPEED UP da attack on your body's well-being. This is often a major reason dat your parent's sister may look relatively (pun not intended, but it's still hilarious! :P) slim and healthy, whereas her husband will be bloated and groaningly unwell.
A famous $10,000-winner (i.e., first prize for humor and/or adorable cuteness) video on AFV featured a small boy wincingly gagging down an escargot; he had been intensely concerned about the nicotine-habit of his parent's huge brawny brother whom he "loved to death" (pun intended that time!), and thus he had been pleadingly on said lumbering leviathan case to get him to quit da cancer-sticks which were no doubt producing unclebodies in said beloved male relative's blood ("I really savor your companionship and playing sports wif you, Uncle Bob, and so I don't wanna have you die before your time!"); said good-natured coffin-nails-puffer had therefore obligingly offered to abstain from da Winstons and Marlboros till at least da rest of da summer if his pint-sized nephew would try just one gourmet snail (probably he greatly enjoyed said "delicacies" himself, but so far had only met with disgusted revulsion when offering them to his brother's young son), and so said dedicated lad was willing to go through a bit of gastronomical agony himself to help save his towering uncle's health.
by QuacksO February 7, 2020
Get the unclebodies mug.