sloppy jalopey 

A slang word meaning flacid penis. Mostly used on flame sites, I've copywrite it.

Silvia, get off my sloppy jalopey, I gotta go to work.

Don't make me slap you with my sloppy jalopey.

sloppy jalopey by Rikimaru November 9, 2003

sloppy jalopy 

A sloppy jalopy is a sexual act for partners very comfortable with each other. During fellatio, when the man is about to climax, he pushes the girl away, cums in his own hand and smacks the girl in the face with it. This is called a sloppy jalopy.

He gave me a sloppy jalopy. It was so romantic.

sloppy jalopy by geoff May 20, 2005

Sloppy Jalopy Fartcake 

When you stretch a woman's bunghole pretty wide, and take a shit in her ass, and fill it up with all sorts of magical drinks, beverages and other fizzy stuff. You then jam a buttplug in her asshole for 30 minutes, the whole time she is running around a racetrack full of crippled deer in order to make the concoction rather fizzy.

She will then release the plug this, causing a rather large farting sound due to the built up gas, and a nice mess on the floor. Proceed to pick up this mess with a flask, and pour it into her mouth while farting down her nostrils. This will cause her to suffocate and regurgitate the delightful product that you have made in order to feed to your cat, who will enjoy it thoroughly, or your money back.

L: Dude I feel like a Sloppy Jalopy Fartcake with my bitch tonight.
C: Sounds delightful.

Sloppy Jalopy Fartcake by Billy Bob Goat II June 19, 2009

reverse sloppy jalopy 

When you’re giving your man fellatio and just before he cums, you pull it out and finish in your hand then slap him across the face with it.

My boyfriend was a dick to me last night so I gave him a reverse sloppy jalopy

reverse sloppy jalopy by Kiss me quick August 4, 2019

Sloppy Jalopy 

When you take your bitch out to Mexican and she still has jalapeno seeds on her tongue when she give you dome.

Example:
"I knew you shouldn't have gotten the green chili enchiladas. My dick is still burning from that sloppy jalopy. I would have preferred toothy toppy."

Sloppy Jalopy by UltimateGooby April 22, 2019

sloppy jalopy 

when a car that someone had sex in is left with sexual residues, like snail trails and cum stains, on the seats, carpets, door panels, steering wheel, stick shift, etc.

Jason: I just banged my girlfriend in this car at a cemetery. Look, there's still cum stains on the back seat.
Marco: Awe man, you're disgusting. Let me out of this sloppy jalopy.

sloppy jalopy by Sapidpaean January 28, 2009

Sloppy Jalopy 

Ejaculating into your hand and then preceding to slap dat bitch across the face.

Lui Kang gave Kung Lao a sloppy jalopy.

Sloppy Jalopy by Sir William Cosby October 1, 2005