simpitis
Ye has contracted simpitis
simpitis by I am the ultimate retard August 24, 2020
Words you can keep
Melon Simpitis
Melon Simpitis is defined as a psychological disorder, that is in every male, but sometimes controlled by some, that plagues all males, whenever a girl approaches, they become extreme simps. This happens and is not limited to Discord, IG, Snapchat, Facebook, or even real life.
Kind of like veelas from Harry Potter, or Sirens from Greek Mythology, but this is very real.
Symptoms (Hah, simptoms):
- People suddenly act polite, offer to send money/buy things for her
- They want to marry her (using the MarriageBot in Discord)
- They want to write about her 'bodily functions' :/ -- These are literal symptoms, not exaggerations
- They want to change their profile to match hers
- They want to charm her and show her that they have good jokes
- They defend her whenever she is even slightly thrown a joke at.
- They wanna be her slave
- They want her. -- This is the last simp stage. At this point the people are dangerous. People like Alinity or Pokimane have such men (they gladly profit from them too)
A Coincidence?
40% of all Melons have cat profile pictures.
Kind of like veelas from Harry Potter, or Sirens from Greek Mythology, but this is very real.
Symptoms (Hah, simptoms):
- People suddenly act polite, offer to send money/buy things for her
- They want to marry her (using the MarriageBot in Discord)
- They want to write about her 'bodily functions' :/ -- These are literal symptoms, not exaggerations
- They want to change their profile to match hers
- They want to charm her and show her that they have good jokes
- They defend her whenever she is even slightly thrown a joke at.
- They wanna be her slave
- They want her. -- This is the last simp stage. At this point the people are dangerous. People like Alinity or Pokimane have such men (they gladly profit from them too)
A Coincidence?
40% of all Melons have cat profile pictures.
A Random Melon: Hi
Felix: Heyyy, how's it going?
Melon: Great, how about you?
Belarus: Omg i wanna write about your period, yes.
Melon: what the fuck, no i don't want yo--
Felix: omg yesssssssssssss
Nikolai: I wanna be you, send pfp link
Kass: Check out my Hoxha bunkers 😏
Melon: Guys stop pls this is weird
Skrab: Yeah guys! She doesn't like it! She only likes it from me
Melon: DUDE. I DON-
Matias: I wanna be your slave
All aforementioned people: I'll buy you nitro if you marry me
Melon's Husband: Wtf? Immoral, how dare you all? Where are your ethics?
Melon: I wanna die. I hate Melon Simpitis.
Spoop: I made a fanfic of you.
Felix: Heyyy, how's it going?
Melon: Great, how about you?
Belarus: Omg i wanna write about your period, yes.
Melon: what the fuck, no i don't want yo--
Felix: omg yesssssssssssss
Nikolai: I wanna be you, send pfp link
Kass: Check out my Hoxha bunkers 😏
Melon: Guys stop pls this is weird
Skrab: Yeah guys! She doesn't like it! She only likes it from me
Melon: DUDE. I DON-
Matias: I wanna be your slave
All aforementioned people: I'll buy you nitro if you marry me
Melon's Husband: Wtf? Immoral, how dare you all? Where are your ethics?
Melon: I wanna die. I hate Melon Simpitis.
Spoop: I made a fanfic of you.
Melon Simpitis by Paki, Gen. of Pakistan November 7, 2020
Related Words
simpitism
Simpitism is the force of someone simping so hard that they soon envelope everyone that they care about into a storm of "I love her!!" and "We are perfect for each other!" The person who is having the simpitism soon either decides to quit simping or they simp harder.
Guy1: Bro, Humphrey's simpitism almost got him arrested last night!
Guy2: Humphrey needs to stop simping!
Guy2: Humphrey needs to stop simping!
simpitism by TheGarfunkle March 21, 2020
More from Urban Dictionary
Back when I lived in upstate new york
A meaningless, unimpressive, self-serving introduction. An indicator that the story about to be shared will be pointless and dumb.
Back when I lived in upstate new york, I also had to park on the street - on two occasions, we got enough snow, mixed with just the right plowing, that my car was lifted off the ground from so much snow being jammed underneath it.
Back when I lived in upstate new york by NDcent December 14, 2010
Word of the Day on August 31, 2026
TLDU
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Me: Woah! TLDU!
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Salad Days
green inexperienced youthful judgement and cold blooded execution of those judgements.
Rashness with little concern of consequence.
Antony and Cleopatra. William Shakespeare
"My salad days,
When I was green in judgment, cold in blood."
- William Shakespeare, Antony and Cleopatra, 1.5
Rashness with little concern of consequence.
Antony and Cleopatra. William Shakespeare
"My salad days,
When I was green in judgment, cold in blood."
- William Shakespeare, Antony and Cleopatra, 1.5
Salad Days by GilbyRFC0 October 7, 2011
Word of the Day on August 28, 2026
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board chow
A)
The Crud that collects under the keys in a keyboard. Usually more severe in the keyboards of programmers and webmasters as they tend to spend a lot of time at the the computer and thus eat at their desk. Mainly affecting IBM Model M (clicly) style boards.
B)
Can also be used to gross out Non-Techie people
The Crud that collects under the keys in a keyboard. Usually more severe in the keyboards of programmers and webmasters as they tend to spend a lot of time at the the computer and thus eat at their desk. Mainly affecting IBM Model M (clicly) style boards.
B)
Can also be used to gross out Non-Techie people
A)
Bill: want to go to the club?
Bob: No, I've got to clean out my board chow, keys are starting to stick.
B)
Bill: Want to go out to get a bite?
Bob: No, i am just going to have some of my board chow/
Bill: Whats' that?
Bob: The food scraps that collect in my keyboard; Want some?
Bill: *GAG* *HURL* *GAG*
Bill: want to go to the club?
Bob: No, I've got to clean out my board chow, keys are starting to stick.
B)
Bill: Want to go out to get a bite?
Bob: No, i am just going to have some of my board chow/
Bill: Whats' that?
Bob: The food scraps that collect in my keyboard; Want some?
Bill: *GAG* *HURL* *GAG*
board chow by BinaryHackerMan September 3, 2007
Word of the Day on August 26, 2026