2 definition by Paki, Gen. of Pakistan

Top Definition
Rayness, not to be confused by Gayness,

Is a condition when someone suddenly was "attacked" by cats.
Some Background Info:

Attacked is in quotations because cats never attack, they love. The cat shared their power with the Ray, the person benefited by Rayness, and he becomes a cat.
All cats were made like this since 289 BCE.

There is an original Ray, from 289 BCE. He currently resides in Buckingham Palace and can be met on Discord. Rumour is he spies for the cats in a server known as Leon's USSR. Very terrifying. I wouldn't want to be Leon.
Ray has special powers, due to his Rayness.

He has these specific powers:
Regenerative Healing Factor, Adoptive Muscle Memory, Body Part Substitution, Anatomical Liberation, Additional Limbs,
Organic Constructs, Defection, Replication, Invisibility, Laser Eyes, Transfiguration, and the Sonic Scream.

Rayness itself, now that we have covered the background info,
is the condition that occurs once you are attacked by cats. You become the most nicest person on Earth, giving people money, loving cats, and being an overall joy to even the most wretched people. Significant changes include, but are not limited to, loving cats, saying :c, >:c, ;c, c:, aaaaaa, yeye, yeap, and being immune to Melon Simpitis.

RAY IS THE CHAD.

People bow to Ray, the one with Rayness. Rayness is easily accessible by everyone to become a Ray.
Ray: Haiiiiii
Bobert the Cat: Heyyy
Melon: Yo its Ray!
*Everyone*: Ay ray, my man
Mikhail: psst yo, spy on this guy
Leon: Not surprisingly, you have done exactly 92857345940392876298590105869 different tasks in 5 minutes. Impressive
Kass: Ray is a robot, confirmed
Matias: Word
Felix: RAY, Arrest that man
Yusuf: I wanna have Rayness
Bobbo: HI DAD!
Kimba: Bruh me too
Vasily: Ray my REDACTED
Snowflake: *sues Vasily*
Snowflake: I'll never sue Ray tho

Hokage: Ray, you must translate this.
Ray: I love Rayness, lemme give all of you some!
via giphy
by Paki, Gen. of Pakistan November 30, 2020

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Melon Simpitis is defined as a psychological disorder, that is in every male, but sometimes controlled by some, that plagues all males, whenever a girl approaches, they become extreme simps. This happens and is not limited to Discord, IG, Snapchat, Facebook, or even real life.

Kind of like veelas from Harry Potter, or Sirens from Greek Mythology, but this is very real.

Symptoms (Hah, simptoms):
- People suddenly act polite, offer to send money/buy things for her
- They want to marry her (using the MarriageBot in Discord)

- They want to write about her 'bodily functions' :/ -- These are literal symptoms, not exaggerations
- They want to change their profile to match hers
- They want to charm her and show her that they have good jokes

- They defend her whenever she is even slightly thrown a joke at.
- They wanna be her slave
- They want her. -- This is the last simp stage. At this point the people are dangerous. People like Alinity or Pokimane have such men (they gladly profit from them too)

A Coincidence?

40% of all Melons have cat profile pictures.
A Random Melon: Hi
Felix: Heyyy, how's it going?
Melon: Great, how about you?
Belarus: Omg i wanna write about your period, yes.
Melon: what the fuck, no i don't want yo--
Felix: omg yesssssssssssss
Nikolai: I wanna be you, send pfp link
Kass: Check out my Hoxha bunkers 😏
Melon: Guys stop pls this is weird
Skrab: Yeah guys! She doesn't like it! She only likes it from me
Melon: DUDE. I DON-
Matias: I wanna be your slave
All aforementioned people: I'll buy you nitro if you marry me
Melon's Husband: Wtf? Immoral, how dare you all? Where are your ethics?
Melon: I wanna die. I hate Melon Simpitis.
Spoop: I made a fanfic of you.
via giphy
by Paki, Gen. of Pakistan November 07, 2020

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