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mastearbate

To intentionally cause oneself to cry.
We caught Jeff mastearbating in front of a chick because he thought it'd get him laid.

Lets mastearbate together.
by paradox222 April 29, 2008
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Masterbathon

a masterbathon is a day that you stay home from school "sick" so you can beat off so many times that you are dry and chaffed and can't walk so the next day you have to stay home and do it all over again
Mike: "Damn jimmy has been out of school all week"
Steve: "I konw he must be having a masterbathon"
by LifeguardSteve April 27, 2004
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Management Masterbation

When Management does something purely for their gratification that will produce nothing.
Team building exersizes, employee surveys are just a few examples of management masterbation.
by jayray59 May 6, 2010
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maskerbater

A mask wearer who derives pleasure from...
1. Wearing masks in stupid places (ie: their car, shower, or bed.
2. "Enforcing" mask wearing by yelling at others to put their masks on.
Karen is such a maskerbater. She just peered over and yelled, "Hey! Stop being a murderer. Put your mask on!" - I was pooping in a stall.
by MBWDT July 25, 2020
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masterbatorium

A confined space used for masterbation. A masterbatorium will sometimes have pictures of naked bodies hanging on the walls for visual stimulation. Those little rooms in the porn store that you stick quarters in, those are masterbatoriums. A masterbatorium will generally smell of lotion or crusted semen. You get a feeling of filth when you walk into a masterbatorium.
The guy who lived below me had his room completely wallpapered with centerfolds of Playboy Playmates, this was obviosly a masterbatorium.
by Russ Buss April 8, 2006
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masterbate

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violent masterbation

Masterbating in an extreme manner; associated with shaking, yelling, high speed, and possibly pain.
Josh had the greatest money-shots ever, but he died from too much violent masterbation.
by Bigg N October 27, 2006
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