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jack you off 

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When a person, male or female, tends to stroke your penis until you get off. Otherwise known as a handjob. It is another way to have someone else masturbate you when you really do not want to have sex.
Last night Sarah asked me, "Can I jack you off? So, I said "sure".
"Wow, I really would love to jack you off, baby!"
jack you off by Thotcrates October 3, 2016
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jack you off 

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A term people use to describe the act of a woman jerking off a guy and then proceeds to do one of two things:

- put the semen in her mouth (SHE WILL ONLY DO THIS FOR ATTENTION)
- stroke her vagina across the semen
(SHE WILL DO THIS FOR PREGNANCY)
Michael: Okay, babe. Let's do the, you know...
Beth: Oh, do I get to jack you off?
Michael: Yep! But mouth, not vagina I plan to leave you tomorrow not in 18 years.
jack you off by CrazyChixo October 3, 2016

jack you off 

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Tom: Jack you off
Jack: Yeah I have my ballet class
jack you off by Lostathome October 2, 2016

jack you off 

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The term ised in the act of two horny tansgender women start jerking each others dicks off
Yo Big Stuff, let me jack you off real quick.
jack you off by JOHNNYUSA13 September 25, 2016

Jack me off like you beat your own meat!

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"Jack me off like you beat your own meat!}" is what I tell my {roomie to do to me sometimes.
Hey Matt, Jack me off like you beat your own meat!

You can go jack off with that knowledge 

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What you say when someone states something that we all know and dont need someone to tell us. Used as an insult.
A: Eminem's white.

B: Yes he is, you can go jack off with that knowledge.

A: Tupac's dead.

B: Yes he is dead, you can go jack off with that knowledge.

A: Miley Cyrus is a slut.

B: Yes she is, you can go jack off with that knowledge.

A: The Jonas Brothers are gay.

B: Yes they are, you can go jack off with that knowledge.

A: Lil Wayne is a terrible rapper.

B: Yes he is, you can go jack off with that knowledge.

A: Jessica alba is hot.

B: Yes she is, you can go jack off with that knowledge.
More from Urban Dictionary

Dotard 

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An aging individual who has long lost the ability to make rational sense.
That dotard is going to get us all blown up, if he doesn't calm down .
Dotard by anonymous September 22, 2017
Word of the Day on August 17, 2026

Chancla

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The deadliest weapon known to a Latin kid; a flying slipper/ flip-flop.
My mom hit me with a chancla.
Chancla by TardisBae October 31, 2014
Word of the Day on August 16, 2026

Striver 

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The striver is an interesting phenomenon that is seen across college campuses. In essence, the striver is an over-achiever who comes from a working or middle class family. He may be an immigrant. He may have been a slacker in HS who was "born again" into an academic wunderkind. Or he may just be an over-achiever who is keeping at it.

The striver is willing to sacrifice his social life at the expense of Phi Beta Kappa and Summa Cum Laude. The striver is the guy who stays at the library long after you are gone. The striver is the guy who takes 30 credits/semester and considers anything below an A/4.0 failure. The striver doesn't work on campus, he is too busy finding ways to pad his resume instead of working retail or workstudy. The striver lets his grades pay his education by applying to ten scholarships a year.

The striver is a future Soros/Fullbright/Rhodes/Gates/Marshall/etc. fellow. The striver lives to study. For the striver, their fun comes from the rewards they expect to receive in return for their diligence. Be it Law School, B-School, academia, or politics. The striver seeks to find the American Dream through academic success.
Anthony was a striver. He transfered from a TTT to an IVY and graduated in 2 years. He studied his ass off and went to Penn Law. He got a Biglaw offer. But lost it all because of an unmoderated mesasgeboard.

Successful strivers:
- Barack Obama
- Harold Koh
Striver by URM Striver January 3, 2009
Word of the Day on August 15, 2026
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