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incapacitated

When one is too intoxicated from drugs or alcohol to function on a normal level and perform daily actions such as drive, work, go to school ect. Not nessisarily indicating a heavy level of intoxication.
I cant come into work today, i took a few more pills than average and im incapacitated.
incapacitated by cptncoleian2 June 16, 2006

incarpacitated 

not having a license or not having a car. being unable to drive people.
dude i can't give you a ride today. my parents took the prius so i'm incarpacitated.

incrapacitated 

When the poops are so bad that you cease to function as a normal human being and concede to the demands of your colon, staying as close as you can to the comfort of your own toilet.
"Hey bro, I can't come out tonight, that epic lunchtime rampage has left me incrapacitated."
incrapacitated by 2Jewswalkintoabar December 20, 2014

incatpacitated

The state of being rendered completely useless due to the presence of a sleeping feline on your lap.
Hey Dave, can you please get the door?

I can't. I'm incatpacitated!
incatpacitated by notbait January 9, 2019

Incatacitated 

When you have been incapacitated by a cat deciding to sit, lie or snuggle next to you.
Sorry I can't make breakfast, I'm incatacitated
Incatacitated by Rausages September 23, 2023

Legally incapacitated

Someone who uses illness to avoid legal proceedings
The accused's trial was scheduled to begin today, but he was legally incapacitated and convenientally in hospital so it had to be postponed.
Legally incapacitated by Ruerzi October 12, 2011
More from Urban Dictionary

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026
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