esurprise 

what you get when the guy you just met on eHarmony turns out to be a big tool.

Susan: Well. I'm dating a new guy, but we've been out 4 times already. The last guy turned out to be a tool.
me: big esurprise

esurprise by fortner December 30, 2008

esurprise 

The result of meeting and/or dating someone on eHarmony who turns out to be a huge tool/douchebag/broham.

Susan: Yea, we dated for 3 weeks, but he turned out to be a tool.
David: Big esurprise.

esurprise by Fortner January 3, 2009

Ganges Surprise 

The act of ejaculating into one's palm and slapping someone.

Fred: What's happening dude?
Bob: Ganges surprise!!
Fred: What the heck is that??
Bob: My sperm. Duh.

Ganges Surprise by SkittleLicker April 29, 2011

Double-wide Surprise 

An exceptionally large and visually appealing man ass that has somehow been concealed. Usually sought after by cross-dressing rabbits.

Look I ain't gay or anything, I just got caught off guard by Elmer's Double-wide surprise.

Double-wide Surprise by Master chunks February 2, 2020

Whoopty Surprise 

When a woman gives you a blowjob, pauses to give you a handjob, and you ejaculate on her face with no prior warning.

“John: yeah man, Sally was going down on me, and just when she stopped and started jerking me off, boom, whoopty surprise.

Jack: dude, that’s gross.”

Whoopty Surprise by Scorpion2458 August 28, 2018

european surprise 

During a threesome with two males and one female, when one male is about to finish they do so in the mouth of the other male.

"I had a threesome with John and Sarah yesterday"
"Nice, did you nut in her?"
"Nah, I gave John a European Surprise"

european surprise by divinemuffin February 8, 2019

Surprised the hell out of me 

Well, as you could probably guess it means that you are surprised. But it’s surprised in BIG CAPITAL LETTERS with explosions, earthquakes and tidal waves followed by a total eclipse of the sun. It’s the sort of surprise that you would feel when as you were feeding your cat she looked up at you and said “You’re fucking joking! I’m not eating that; it looks like puke and smells like shit! Get me some chicken or a piece of oak smoked ham, you arsehole.”

Malcolm actually did something right first time, it surprised the hell out of me.

Surprised the hell out of me by AKACroatalin December 15, 2016