Crandles

The opposite of Cyphix. Therefore, crandles are terrible with the broads, and usually stay virgins well past their middle age crisis.

Only crandles waste their life playing Dungeons and Dragons in their parents basement.

Crandles by Booski January 29, 2006

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Sixteen Candles

A classic 1980's John Hughes flick that chronicles the story of Samantha, a sixteen year old whose family has forgotten her birthday. Jake Ryan, the "perfect" guy in school, saves the day- saving Samantha from her sister's awful wedding, and buying her a birthday cake. This movie is famous for it's archetype characters- 'The geek'- Called either Farmer Ted, or the Geek, and played by Anthony Michael Hall, 'the perfect man'- Jake Ryan, played by actor/model Michael Schoeffling, and 'the awkward high school girl', played by Molly Ringwald. The character of Jake Ryan has grown extrememly popular over the years as an example of a perfect man- smart, rich, courteous, sweet, considerate- and one who breaks up with the curvy, beautiful head cheerleader for the gawky, awkward younger girl.

Girl- "I just saw Sixteen Candles today."
Friend- "And?"
Girl- "I want my own Jake Ryan."

Sixteen Candles by PunkRokinPromQueen May 4, 2006

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crandled

verb: to make a huge mistake. to fuck up. to shit the bed.

Joe won't get the big promotion because he totally crandled that report his boss asked him to do.

crandled by happy hour annie July 24, 2016

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Soggy Candlestick

When a male sticks a toothpick in their dick hole, lights it on fire, then proceeds to wank it. The resulting disaster when jizz meets fire is a Soggy Candlestick.

I saw Leroy lighting up his penis with a Soggy Candlestick last night!

Soggy Candlestick by SoggyCandlestick November 28, 2010