A mammoth
college that dominates the town of Hackettstown NJ. The food rocks, the students are
true global citizens (global Mondays anyone?), and everyone parties on the weekend. Professors are chill and class sizes are small. They try to
help everyone work to their potential. Our credit system is awesome and makes registration and choosing classes a breeze. Parties start at 5pm and go till 5am without interruption by the
fuzz – provided you are not stupid enough to puke or piss in the hallway in front of your RA’s
door. We run a naked 5k marathon every year to send our beerpong team to the national competition.
Gas leaks can typically cancel your class and we have
snow days clear until May. We have two liquor stores (
one within walking distance). All of our male students are athletic, handsome, intelligent, wealthy, well endowed and true renaissance men. Our females are numerous, bright, funny, and are anything but bitchy – they have great racks too. Applebee’s and Wal-Mart are present (like any college town) but the
real hangouts for cool
people who “know” Hackettstown are Charlie browns,
bar 46, the HUB, and the cocktail room at the trump plaza. Our culture of brotherhood and sisterhood are so strong that we only have
one frat and
one sorority – there is no need for more when everyone gets along so well. The frat is a multicultural (not just black) group of the finest males in NJ. As for the sorority – If you’re in Peith raise your hand, if your not, raise your standards. Last but not least our mascot is a cyclone because we blow the competition away!