captain crackhead 

Noun: A term for one who is wearing a zip-down hoodie with the zip open completely by only the hood on their head (very often notably with no shirt), leaving the arm flaps and the rest of the hoodie to hang behind them as pseudo tribal decoration. Often associated with individuals in this attire performing wildcard stunts and impromptu executive decisions

Verb: To assume the form as described in the noun and perform crackhead and crackhead-esque actions with urgency

Never get in a swamp fight with a captain crackhead - noun
If you don't give me my 25 cents back as a quarter I will captain crackhead this elf on the shelf - verb

captain crackhead by why do i have to come up with March 24, 2023

Captain Cockhead 

head cockhead; leader of the cockheads; most highly qualified cockhead

...and that concludes my report about the day when aliens stole my brain.

Thank you, Captain Cockhead.

Captain Cockhead by yorrick hunt June 13, 2008