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The Calendar Option 

A technique of temporarily “saving face” with colleagues, bosses, customers, and auditors by changing every calendar and clock in a particular workplace in an effort to cover up a missed deadline. “The Calendar Option” is the “Nuclear Option” of work place fault misdirection. “The Calendar Option” should only be used when the monumental task of changing dozens of calendars, clocks, and watches pales in comparison to actually completing ones assigned task on time. Hacking of local computer and cellular networks is usually preferred, as these sources represent the primary ways of determining dates and times. “The Calendar Option” will buy you enough time to prepare a resume, write a cover page, and apply for other jobs in the timespan prior to your superiors realizing you’ve elegantly gamed them to death. Worried about future employment? Don’t! One who can successfully employ “The Calendar Option” is often far under-employed anyway. This fact is clearly demonstrated as the time, energy, intelligence and sheer skill required to pull off the maneuver could be accomplished by no less than an American, tier 1, Special Forces operator who is also a Ninja.
Are you late? Can’t blame a colleague? Can’t blame your computer? Can’t blame the weather? Don’t even bother! Just employ “The Calendar Option” and you won’t need to blame a thing because the calendar and clocks say “you’re not late!”

late nuclear option option ninja bad employee blame

Calendar Shopping 

Those times when you buy a new Calander before New Years. This is usually done a day or two after Christmas.
Person 1: Hey lets go Calendar Shopping. I need to get a new Calander before New Years.

Person 2: Aight. I'm gonna get me one of those FHM calandars.

calendar dump 

When you ring in the New Year on the toilet with one final dump, cleansing yourself from the old and welcoming the new. Starts on December 31st shortly before midnight.
The ball drops in 10 minutes..I've still got time to squeeze out a calendar dump.
calendar dump by C-Lo Brown May 4, 2017

NNN Calendar 

The NNN Calendar is a calendar revolving around NNN.

-Jizz January
-No Finger February
-Massive Masturbate March
-Ass Eating April
-Gay May
-Make It Jelly June
-Even More Jizz July
-Mass Ass August
-Semen Shooter September
-Orgi October
-No Nut November
-Destroy Dick December
"Are you attempting the NNN Calendar"

"Heck Yeah, my dick is going to suffer so much"
NNN Calendar by SpikeyFluffBall November 7, 2019
someone who has an inordinate amount of trouble scheduling, accepting and attending meetings (especially through Outlook)
"Sorry I'm such a calentard -- I swear that meeting fell off of my calendar. Again. Can you forward it to me?"
calentard by kdubs94304 October 7, 2009

calendar wolf 

A wolf that has been hand-raised for the sole reason of photographed for calendars. Usually, calendar wolves look much healthier than their wild cousins, and eat not from freshly killed prey, but a bowl with their name on it. Could also refer to a disingenuous person, or a poseur.
The wolf looks so healthy in that photo because he's a calendar wolf.
calendar wolf by dddrew January 16, 2008
Word of the Day on April 23, 2024
More from Urban Dictionary

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026

Oblication 

A vacation, feeling more like an obligation, that involves visiting or staying with family.
So Joe where are you taking the kids for spring break vacation? We are going on an oblication to Boca to visit my mother-in-law.
Oblication by kimmerr May 5, 2011
Word of the Day on October 25, 2026

Surf Dracula Syndrome 

A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.

For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Word of the Day on October 24, 2026
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