bumwank

a word that is used to describe someone acting like a total tosser and usually someone who enjoys putting strange objects up their anus. Some people are classed as bumwanks if they pluck their nipple hairs and bite their toenails.

“oh my god stephanie you are such a bumwank for putting a lampshade up your bum hole again.”

by mishafarger May 9, 2020

bumwank

When you put your dick between a girls butt cheeks and she wanks your cock using her butt.

That slut jessica gave me a bumwank last night it was good

by Jack_Bauer January 21, 2006

Bumwank

Absolute spanner. A term used in frustration towards someone who has pissed you off.

"Oi, bumwank, what did you do that for?"

by Fairly Talented Thespian January 30, 2008

Shitting Bumwank

The collective noun for people who make reactionary, ill-thought-out and plain racist comments on news websites. Coined by Alex of the blog Speak You're Branes.

Have you seen the massive shitting bumwank of racists on the Telegraph site today?

by SYB Kelvin January 7, 2010

Fingery Bum Wank

When a male person vigorously inserts and retracts his forefinger from his own anus, whilst with his other hand; angrily masturbates to an explosive climax.
Note - is not an exclusively solo act - one could improvise and perhaps masturbate himself while his housemaid or sister assisted with the fingering portion.

1) ...gentleman one to gentleman two "I say, I spiced up my evening tug last night, and fiddled the badge with my forefinger. I believe my son calls it a fingery bum wank".

2) ...young stud remarks "Jesus I had a shocker last night..I convinced this chick to help me out with a fingery bum wank and ended up shitting all over her hand and wrist"..... young studs friend "...nightmare, but respect!"

by The F P February 22, 2011

Chokey pokey bum wank

Self masterbation (usually male) performed simultaniously whilst inserting a finger into the anus and asphixiating ones self, but not beyond the point of passing out. Only enough to reduce the amount of blood flow to the brain so that it is directed towards the penis for a more intense wank.

Tying a belt or a tie to a hook or bar and then putting it around your neck , lean into it to reduce circulation to the head, shove a finger up your butt and away you go, thats having a chokey pokey bum wank!

by swordy January 17, 2013

Bum wank

like a tit wank but with your arse

kristen didn't want full anal so offered a bum wank instead

by watermelonclitlicker May 31, 2010