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bauer • bauer hour • bauered • bauer power • baue • Bauerdick • Bauerism • Bauer-Bauer Combo • Bauer Bradley • bauer'd
Bauer-Bauer Combo
In hockey when a player is a total bender and his helmet is of the Bauer brand attached with the ugly stock Bauer cage. most players, at least cool ones, get the Bauer helmet with a dope CCM or Itech cage, not the ugly grey Bauer one that makes u look like a total fag. So when you see a player that is a complete scrub and is wearing this combination, make sure you complement him on his nice Bauer-Bauer Combo.
Bauer-Bauer Combo by JoeyDangles69 October 15, 2009
Jack Bauer
Chuck Norris is tough, but Jack Bauer is tougher. Walker Texas Ranger never had to deal with Terrorist and get things done in 24 hours….or did he? Anyway, Jack Bauer is tough, and he is the new man with the Random Facts.
1.If you wake up in the morning, it’s because Jack Bauer spared your life.
2.Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
3.If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he’d shoot Nina twice.
4.Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a real fact.
5.Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
6.Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
7.Jack Bauer’s favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.
8. 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
9.If Jack says “I just want to talk to him/her” and that him/her is you… well amigo, you’re fucked.
10.Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
11.Jack Bauer doesn’t miss. If he didn’t hit you it’s because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
12.If you get 7 stars on your wanted level on Grand Theft Auto, Jack Bauer comes after you. You don’t want to get 7 stars.
13.When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps out.
14.Jack Bauer does not sleep. The only rest he needs is what he gets when he’s knocked out or temporarily killed.
15.If you are still conscious, it is because Jack Bauer doesn’t want to carry you.
16.Jack Bauer has no problem following orders, unless you tell him to do something he doesn’t want to.
17.Jack Bauer’s gun is actually a water pistol, but the water shoots out in the form of bullets. Why? Because the gun is being held by Jack fucking Bauer.
18.Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
19.As a child, Jack Bauer’s first words were “There’s no time!”
20.While being ‘put under’ in the hospital, Jack Bauer can count backwards from 100 every time. This annoys the doctors.
21.Jack Bauer can watch all 4 seasons of 24 in 24 hours.
22.Jack Bauer literally died for his country, and lived to tell about it.
23.Jack Bauer’s family threw him a surprise birthday party when he was a child. Once.
24.Killing Jack Bauer doesn’t make him dead. It just makes him angry.
25.Everytime Jack Bauer yells “NOW!” at the end of a sentence, a terrorist dies.
26.If Jack’s starring at someone and his eye twitches, assume that person has less than 15 minutes to live.
27.When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists.
Jack Bauer fucking hates lemonade.
28.Guns dont kill people, Jack Bauer kills people.
29.David Spade always says ‘yes’ to Jack Bauer when he wants to redeem his credit card miles.
30.Don’t ask what Jack Bauer would do for a Klondike bar…
2.Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
3.If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he’d shoot Nina twice.
4.Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a real fact.
5.Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
6.Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
7.Jack Bauer’s favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.
8. 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
9.If Jack says “I just want to talk to him/her” and that him/her is you… well amigo, you’re fucked.
10.Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
11.Jack Bauer doesn’t miss. If he didn’t hit you it’s because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
12.If you get 7 stars on your wanted level on Grand Theft Auto, Jack Bauer comes after you. You don’t want to get 7 stars.
13.When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps out.
14.Jack Bauer does not sleep. The only rest he needs is what he gets when he’s knocked out or temporarily killed.
15.If you are still conscious, it is because Jack Bauer doesn’t want to carry you.
16.Jack Bauer has no problem following orders, unless you tell him to do something he doesn’t want to.
17.Jack Bauer’s gun is actually a water pistol, but the water shoots out in the form of bullets. Why? Because the gun is being held by Jack fucking Bauer.
18.Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
19.As a child, Jack Bauer’s first words were “There’s no time!”
20.While being ‘put under’ in the hospital, Jack Bauer can count backwards from 100 every time. This annoys the doctors.
21.Jack Bauer can watch all 4 seasons of 24 in 24 hours.
22.Jack Bauer literally died for his country, and lived to tell about it.
23.Jack Bauer’s family threw him a surprise birthday party when he was a child. Once.
24.Killing Jack Bauer doesn’t make him dead. It just makes him angry.
25.Everytime Jack Bauer yells “NOW!” at the end of a sentence, a terrorist dies.
26.If Jack’s starring at someone and his eye twitches, assume that person has less than 15 minutes to live.
27.When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists.
Jack Bauer fucking hates lemonade.
28.Guns dont kill people, Jack Bauer kills people.
29.David Spade always says ‘yes’ to Jack Bauer when he wants to redeem his credit card miles.
30.Don’t ask what Jack Bauer would do for a Klondike bar…
Jack Bauer by Rich Headley July 22, 2008
Jack Bauer Power Dump
1. Noun
During the commericals on 24, Jack Bauer quickly takes huge shits that are both extremly quick and extremly potent
2. Verb
To take a Jack Bauer Power Dump
When out in public and you have to take a dump really bad and have to use a public toilet but don't want to spend a lot of time on the seat so you force everything out really fast.
During the commericals on 24, Jack Bauer quickly takes huge shits that are both extremly quick and extremly potent
2. Verb
To take a Jack Bauer Power Dump
When out in public and you have to take a dump really bad and have to use a public toilet but don't want to spend a lot of time on the seat so you force everything out really fast.
"Man, I just took a huge Jack Bauer Power Dump."
"Jack where have you been?" "Taking a Jack Bauer Power Dump."
"Jack where have you been?" "Taking a Jack Bauer Power Dump."
Jack Bauer Power Dump by Crapper July 22, 2008
Kim Bauer
Agathe Bauer
An Agathe Bauer is a song line which you believe sounds like a phrase or name in another language, usually German.
I've got the power - Agathe Bauer
All the leaves are brown - Anneliese Braun
All my feeling grow - Oma fiel ins Klo
All the leaves are brown - Anneliese Braun
All my feeling grow - Oma fiel ins Klo
Agathe Bauer by IlPartigiano October 10, 2011
More from Urban Dictionary
pod person
A person pretending to be something they aren't, or an impostor. This is inferred because of the old alien movies where alien pods appear on earth and the "pod people" dispose of the humans and slowly reproduce the bodies, pretending to be humans.
The pod person was pretending to be my father, but I knew that he was an alien when he acted differently than my father ever would have.
pod person by Christopher M. May 9, 2005
Word of the Day on November 10, 2026
dead drop
A dead drop is a location used to secretly pass items between two people, without requiring them to meet.
Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.
A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.
A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.
Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.
A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.
A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.
"The dead drop is the restroom toilet at the Gulf station at the corner of Commercial Ave. and Georges Rd."
dead drop by rubberroom July 23, 2008
Word of the Day on November 9, 2026
No Surprises Wedding
A "No Surprises Wedding," or NSW, is a wedding invitation designation that tells attendees that there can be no unplanned announcements, engagements, events or speeches at the wedding - all actions must be pre-approved by the couple. Anyone who performs an unapproved "surprise" will be asked to leave the wedding early.
This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.
This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.
You are cordially invited to the nuptials of Brian and Tom on October 31 at noon.
Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.
Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.
No Surprises Wedding by dbdefenestrate August 27, 2023
Word of the Day on November 8, 2026
ulzzang
Ulzzang true definition is "best & "face" = best face in korean. They are basically people with above average looks, sometimes with the use of photoshop and haduri who post their pics online, some becoming internet celebrities.
ulzzang by `r i k kit t y February 26, 2008
Word of the Day on November 7, 2026
EBK
EBK stands for "Elite Ball Knowledge." 1 In internet slang, "ball knowledge" originally referred to a deep understanding of football/soccer or basketball, but it has evolved into a broader term for having a highly sophisticated, deep, or niche understanding of any specific topic (such as music, movies, or subcultures).