balum 

balum is a fucking powerful word that can be used interchangeably in any non-sober situation.

dumbass: im so baked
dude: yoo pass bong
*dumbass drops the bong*
dude: balllummm!!!!!!

godddamnnnn niggggger...................balum.

holy fuck were in the middle of the forest and surrounded by tree jumping niggers. balum balum!

balum by smokey mcpott nagger April 21, 2010

balumpabump 

A person (usually a girl) who is so obese that one may wonder how a person could let themselves get that big. These people tend to have a spherical/ elliptical shaping because of the incredible amount of fat tissue that eliminates the natural curves of a human being.

**Balumpabump walks in**
Person 1: Oh my lord. Look at her
Person 2: Wow what a balumpabump
Person 1: How could a person let themselves turn into that

balumpabump by jetsman2528 August 7, 2010

Balamer 

n. In Baltimoron, this is the "home city" of Baltimore. While this is the usual spelling for the word, a more correctly phonetic spelling would be "Bawlamer." (Those of you in the Mid-West might pronounce the first "a" as a short a, and that would be incorrect.) Baltimore is frequently shortened further to "Balmer." Again, this is the accepted spelling, but a more correctly phonetic spelling would be "Bawlmer."

"Doen'cha knoe, I'm from Balamer,
'n' crabs is whut I'm eechin' feur!
Doen'cha knoe, Santa dear,
With sum cold crabs 'nd a beer,
It would be jus like a trip back to old Bal-tee-more,
Baaaaal-teeee-mooore!"
-- David DeBoy, 'Crabs For Christmas'

Balamer by Dan Weyandt April 9, 2008

Who told you to put the balm on? 

A response to someone who does something that undermines a perfectly devious strategy, taken from the words of Jackie Childs from Seinfeld when Kramer put balm on his thighs which cured the burns from a hot cup of coffee, thus thwarting their strategy to sue for permanent disfigurement.

I set up a fake meeting in my calendar so I wouldn't have to go to the staff meeting, then you screwed it up by suggesting we push the staff meeting back an hour. Who told you to put the balm on?

Who told you to put the balm on? by RJPSYR September 1, 2009

Ballmer Peak

The theory that computer programmers obtain quasi-magical, superhuman coding ability when they have a blood alcohol concentration percentage between 0.129% and 0.138%. The discovery of this effect is attributed to Steve Ballmer, CEO of Microsoft - who probably "discovered" it by simply monitoring his own perpetually inebriated nervous system, and deducing that programming ability "peaks" after a few drinks and then dips dramatically after full-blown drunkenness ensues.

If you can convince your boss that this is all based on legitimate science, and that the effect is real (i.e. your drunkeness = better code = more money for the company), then you will have achieved perfection in this world. There will be no reason to ever come back sober from lunch again.

Also known as "The Ballmer Curve" and "The Ballmer Effect" this state has been observed by people who play darts... and musicians. Although, to be fair, musicians only notice the effect briefly (and totally by accident) as they transition from complete sobriety to absolute drunkeness - without ever even trying to moderate their alcohol intake in order to stay at the peak.

I had three more Long Island Teas after I had already hit the Ballmer Peak, so now none of my fucking code will compile.

Ballmer Peak by cathodeRay February 4, 2008

balubar 

usually a balubar is a very stupid guy doing stuff that irritates other people.

i know man he's such a balubar

balubar by dravv July 29, 2020

heart balm 

Any common remedy for those trying to get over heartbreak.

You have been so depressed ever since you and your girlfriend broke up. You need a heart balm, like a dog to keep you company or maybe you should join some clubs.

heart balm by Nique January 4, 2005