53 definitions by Dan Weyandt

n. A mixed drink, similar in taste to a mudslide, but with definite coffee tones. Very tasty! Here's the recipe:

2 shots Kahlua
1 shot Amaretto
1/2 cup Half-and-half
6 Ice cubes

Mixing instructions:
Add above ingrediants in a blender. Blend on high until the ice is crushed. Serve in a cocktail glass. No garnish.

A variation of the drink is called the Spunky Orangutan. For those who don't like coffee at all, replace the Kahlua with Bailey's Irish Cream. While chocolatey and without coffee bitterness of the Spunky Monkey, it also has an amazing hint of marchino cherry. Also very tasty!
Hey barkeep! Another Spunky Monkey, please!
by Dan Weyandt April 10, 2008
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n. In Baltimoron, it's the "Old Line State," or the state on the south side of the Mason-Dixon Line, and the state where Batimore rests at the mouth of the Patapsco River. Yes, for the rest of the English-speaking world, this would be the state of Maryland.
Doen'cha knoe, I'm from Merlin!
by Dan Weyandt April 24, 2008
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n. A government of the least competent elected by the least industrious so that the government can confiscate wealth from the dwindling competent, productive populace.
One can recognize an incompetocracy when a government hasn't passed a budget in years, boasts of its exploits using oxymorons like "lead from behind," openly demonstrates its disdain and disrespect for the serf-like governed, e.g., calling them "racist, red-necked retards," but is re-elected.

Note that an incompetocracy cannot exist without a corrupt press that refuses to expose the incompetence and corruption of said incompetocracy and assists the incompetocracy in the character assassination of those who would competently govern.
by Dan Weyandt November 26, 2012
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n. In Baltimoron, this refers to Ocean City, MD, and would be literally translated as "down to the ocean." Ocean City, MD is a very popular vacation destination, and a source of much regional culture. For example, 19th Street is named "Johnny Unitas Way," honoring the great Baltimore Colts quarterback of the 1960s and 1970s, who wore the number 19.
Doen'cha knoe, hon, we wint downy oshun, but't took frevr t'git uvr dat dang Baybrij!

Translation: My friend of the opposite sex, we traveled to Ocean City, MD, but it took an exasperatingly inordinate amount of time to cross the Chesapeake Bay using the Chesapeake Bay Bridge.

Note: Traffic for the Chesapeake Bay Bridge can be backed up for 15 miles on summer weekends.
by Dan Weyandt April 9, 2008
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n. Ohio State Correctional System work release program.
They just sent another of the Cincinnati Bengals back to prison.
by Dan Weyandt October 4, 2007
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v. A metaphor for a person or a group of people believing their own lies and propaganda. The effects of doing this can be comical, e.g., Baghdad Bob, but this is usually the harbinger of the demise of the practitioner(s).
When Mikhail Gorbachev instituted Perestroika and Glasnost, it was obvious that the leadership of the Soviet Union was having a big session of "drink your own bathwater," assuming that Communism was actually about helping workers. Glasnost exposed the average Russian to the lies they had been told, particularly about how awful their standard-of-living was as compared to the West. Subsequently, Gorbachev and the Soviet Union lasted only six years.
by Dan Weyandt March 27, 2013
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n. Crony capitalism is a colloquial term describing a "market economy" in which success in business depends on close relationships between business people and government officials. It may be exhibited by favoritism to connected businesses in the distribution of legal permits, government grants, special tax breaks, and so forth. This favoritism is rewarded by campaign contributions or outright kickbacks to politicians or their supporters. As such, it creates an oxymoron of sorts, in that success of a business in a free market (capitalism) does not depend on free-market forces. It is also a obvious source of corruption of both business and government.
In the United States, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac are examples of Crony Capitalism. Government backing let Fannie and Freddie dominate mortgage underwriting. The politicians created the mortgage giants, which then returned some of the profits to the politicians - sometimes directly, as campaign funds; sometimes as "contributions" to favored constituents.
by Dan Weyandt October 5, 2011
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