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authentifuckation 

Gritty slang for the absurd and insanity-provoking multi-step process that is part of doing anything online these days in order to prove beyond any possible doubt that you are in fact you.
After multiple attempts to get into my own phone in a moment of panicked need, the authentifuckation process got the best of me and I needed to be placed on a 5150 hold when I began repeatedly bashing my iPhone against a building and screaming obscenities at the top of my lungs.
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authentification 

1. Describes an authentication process which is not working (hence the 'f' in the word).
2. A word used by a manager when they cannot pronounce 'authentication'.
Examples:
1. Damn! I just logged onto the system with no password. Now that's authentification!
2. This year the company will be focusing on authentification itself.
authentification by The employee August 13, 2010