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a swimming pool band-aid 

Something that is disgusting and should never be touched.
Hans: I was with Anna last night and things were really great and then it was all over! She acted grossed out and left!
Albert: What happened? I thought last night was going to be the night?
Hans: Me too. I took off my pants and she looked at it like it was a swimming pool band-aid.
Albert: Well, you have that artsy circumcision with the side-flaps. You gotta get that fixed. Your parents did you no favors.
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a swimming pool band-aid 

Something that is disgusting and should never be touched.
Hans: I was with Anna last night and things were really great and then it was all over! She acted grossed out and left!
Albert: What happened? I thought last night was going to be the party night?
Hans: Me too. I showed Heather's Vaseline to her and she looked at it like it was a swimming pool band-aid.
Albert: Well, you showed Heather's Vaseline. Anna thinks Vaseline is gross.

Baby Heather: (lisping) It was me swimming pool band-aid!! 😊👉👈
Hans: Heather, we don't mean your literal bandage in the pool.
Baby Heather: Hmm.
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That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
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