TURDle wax

Get a girl naked..preferably one you dislike. Have her lie naked on the bed face down. Tell her you have to use the bathroom. While in the bathroom, shit just far enough out of your ass so the shit hangs a good couple inches. When you come out of the bathroom run and slide across her back like you would across the hood of a car.

I saw this Bitch i hated. So I decided to TURDle wax her!

by allen bak February 22, 2008

Turdle Wax

When you’re receiving a handjob and you have to take a shit, so your partner open palm catches it and proceeds to use your turd to jerk you off.

Glenn really enjoys when chicks turdle wax him after a his pineapple pizza’s.

by Cracklized November 15, 2017

turtle wax

A term used to describe someone who waxes, or appears to wax, their pubic hair.

It's as smooth as a tortoise's shell down there - I just got me a turtle wax!

by Jazzual December 18, 2012

turtle wax

The act of ejaculating in someone's helmet while it is left unattended, then getting them to place it on their head. A practical joke particular to the military.

Joe left his helmet in the truck so I rubbed one out in it then he put it on, it was the perfect turtle wax.

by Aco FIST October 22, 2013

Jamaican Turtle Wax

While smoking marijuan and listening to Bob Marley, while having anal sex, you ejaculate all over the bitches back and rub it in ever so gently. If you do this right it should leave a nice glossy polish.

My mom walked in while i was giving Brooke a Jamaican Turtle Wax.

by Chris B and Mason B September 4, 2008

Double-Decker Kowabonga Turtle Wax Collision

It is a way of a guy saying he is going to have rawdonkulus intercourse with the opposite gender and not perform any dirty tricks such as a phantom or ice dragon. Its is derived from The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles(Kowabonga which is awesome) and the drill company Double Decker add it with the word collision(intercourse) and turtle wax(symbolizes wetness. words that are ordinary alone but together mean something totally different

guy1: Some fine as chick is looking for a supafly jimmy snooker. Anyone kno who she is?
guy2: Ask dat chick if she wants a Double-Decker Kowabonga Turtle Wax Collision in her ass?

by TheKidJeff November 11, 2006

Turtle Wax

To take such an extremely long time to "wax" (have sex with) a girl that the progress is compared to the slow speed of a turtle.

Luke: "Man I really like Elaina!"
Flow: "Did you wax it yet?"
Luke: "Not yet..."
Flow: "Haha... Another turtle wax!"

by Flow of XplctFlow February 21, 2011